06-13-2005, 04:08 PM | #1 | ||
lolzcat
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: sans pants
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IWS#111 RESULTS (heartily endorsed by st. cronin)
Real Stupid SEX
As an aside, I think it is worth pointing out that every single male entrant preferred death to tonguing Ron Howard. One female entrant enthusiastically embraced life, however. Anyhow, this one wasn't even close. Special recognition to gottimd who not only scored the MIJB#19 Memorial Perfecto (1 point) but also has a nice outline working for a new Suburban White Trash biopic...to be optioned by Miramax in the near future. 1. Name someone that typifies the term "slut". Wow - I thought for sure we would see Pam Anderson or Jenna Jameson or or Tara Reid or Carson Kressley in here...I hope everyone realizes that Paris was humping her boyfriend THAT SHE LOVES VERY MUCH in those videos!!!! And to answer one of you...yes, I am a slut. I get so much tang I have my own wing at the Air and Space Museum here in DC... Paris Hilton 18 Brittney Spears 2 Christina Aguilera 1 Subby 1 My dirty cum dumpster sister who has had anal sex with everyone in my neighborhood, men and women 1 2. Other than a vibrator, what sex toy is found most frequently in American homes? Disappointed that someone was not forced to type Ben-wa Balls here. However, I am pretty sure that the Fist of Fury(tm) is going to be a huge stocking stuffer for the FOFC's married set this coming holiday season. dildo 13 handcuffs 4 anal beads 2 blow up doll 2 whip 1 The Fist of Fury 1 3. At what age do the majority of American males lose their virginity? It would be interesting to know the right answer here - my guess is it is somewhere closer to 20 or 21. I guess if we would have asked "At what age do the majority of American males *that regularly play text based sports simulations* lose their virginity?", then we would have seen the majority answer jump a good five or seven years. Sixteen 14 Seventeen 4 Eighteen 2 Fifteen 1 Fourteen 1 Four (molested by kindegarten teacher) 1 4. In a recent survey, the American Sexuality Institute said that the number one animal that American males used for sex was a sheep. What animal was number two? Hopefully no one Googled this, because I might have made it up. Still, the correct answer is based on years of second hand research provided to me by our Arkansas and Alabama contingents. As an aside, grizzly bears are very tender. dog 11 horse 4 foat 3 cow 1 beaver 1 pig 1 cats 1 a lame mule that is mildly retarded 1 5. What is the most offensive sexual term or phrase you can think of? Really disappointed here. Didn't get the colorful answers for which I was hoping. I challenge anyone to use the term "cunt" in a sexual manner. Dirty Sanchez, Cleveland Steamer, Donkey Punch, Golden Shower, and Playing Hide-and-Go-Seek with Herve Villachez all woefully under-represented. cunt 11 Mother Fucking Cock Sucker 1 (okay, someone who fucks their mother AND sucks cock is probably also mildly offensive) fuck 1 cum dumpster 1 (good one!) mother fucker 1 bestiality 1 Bukkake 1 (patently offensive. good work.) Dirty Sanchez 1 fuck you 1 no 1 Donkey Punch 1 Fucking Cunt Bag Whore 1 (a huge crowd pleaser at birthday parties and bar mitzvahs) 6. Name the least sexy living american male. My secretary thinks I am very sexy. And he knows sexy. "I know a MAN when I see one." - Herb Tarlek Subby 4 Ron Jeremy 3 (Has any man ever done more with less? Maybe Vern Troyer, but that's it). Michael Jackson 3 (I should disqualify this one since he barely qualifies as a living american male). Howard Stern 1 Al Gore 1 Carrot Top 1 (Sexy if you are high on crack. But still not funny.) Gallagher 1 (See Top, Carrot) Michael Moore 1 Dick Cheney 1 George W Bush 1 (definitely the anti-Bill Clinton - our sexiest President since Taft). Otis Nixon 1 Steve Buscemi 1 Brian Peppers 1 SkyDog 1 (speaking of sex items in american homes, I didn't see "large inflatable pool toy) Fritz 1 (I have pictures that will change your mind) Vincent Schiavelli 1 THE RESULTS NOT SEXY Gottimd 1 weinstein7 8 Vexroid 96 MIJB#19 1,008 Raven Hawk 1,512 TheLionKing 1,728 timmae 2,376 kingfc22 2,574 Desnudo 3,276 Shorty3281 8,064 Marginally Sexy EagleFan 10,296 panerd 11,088 Oliegirl 12,012 DeToxRoxDVHStyle 22,176 General Mike 24,024 Raiders Army 36,036 Sexier than Normal ThunderingHERD 226,512 Pyser 339,768 Chas in Cinci 396,396 RainRaven 396,396 Too Sexy for this Contest JeeberD 1,189,188 Radii 1,189,188 THE SEXIEST COMPUTER IN HISTORY QuikSand 1,585,584 Congratulations to DeepStupid...
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Superman was flying around and saw Wonder Woman getting a tan in the nude on her balcony. Superman said I going to hit that real fast. So he flys down toward Wonder Woman to hit it and their is a loud scream. The Invincible Man scream what just hit me in the ass!!!!! I do shit, I take pictures, I write about it: chrisshue.com Last edited by Subby : 06-13-2005 at 04:15 PM. |
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06-13-2005, 04:13 PM | #2 |
General Manager
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: The Town of Flower Mound
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Subby? SUBBY?!? SUBBY?!?!?!?!?! Fucking Subby cost me a back-to-back IWS?
Fuckin' FOFC...
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UTEP Miners!!! I solemnly swear to never cheer for TO Last edited by JeeberD : 06-13-2005 at 04:13 PM. |
06-13-2005, 04:25 PM | #3 |
Coordinator
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: The Black Hole
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I knew I should've put Women as my #4 answer.
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06-13-2005, 04:37 PM | #4 |
Grizzled Veteran
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: St. Louis
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Otis Nixon? Obviously the person who guessed this had no intention of winning. And if so, I would like to vote Willie McGee over Otis Nixon as the ugliest baseball player of all time.
Otis Nixon... vs. Willie McGee |
06-13-2005, 04:45 PM | #5 | |
Dearly Missed
(9/25/77-12/23/08) Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: DC Suburbs
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Quote:
I WIN!
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NAFL New Orleans Saints GM/Co-Commish MP Career Record: 114-85 NAFL Super Bowl XI Champs In memory of Gavin Anthony: 7/22/08-7/26/08 |
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06-13-2005, 06:58 PM | #6 |
lolzcat
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Annapolis, Md
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w00t!
Now, where's the little woman? I'm all revved up from all this dirty talk! |
06-13-2005, 07:02 PM | #7 |
Head Coach
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Michigan
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OH COME ON! GALLAGHER IS HIDEOUS!
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06-13-2005, 07:05 PM | #8 | |
Head Coach
Join Date: Jul 2001
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Quote:
My thoughts exactly. Minus the back to back part. Dear lord. |
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06-13-2005, 07:13 PM | #9 |
Pro Starter
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: The State of Rutgers
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damn you Butters.
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Boise Stampede Continental Football League Jacksonville Jaguars GM North American Football League Nebraska Coach FOFC-BBCF Rutgers & Washington coach Bowl Bound-BBCF |
06-13-2005, 09:26 PM | #10 |
Head Cheerleader
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Caught somewhere between Raising Hell and Amazing Grace...
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I now have the image of radii dancing to the old song, "I'm too sexy" in my head...that is classic! Sadly though, I am only marginally sexy, but appreciate the props for embracing life As long as radii isn't too sexy for me, I guess I can't really complain!
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06-14-2005, 12:41 AM | #11 |
Coordinator
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Here and There
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So Brian Peppers is sexier than Subby?
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06-14-2005, 03:52 AM | #12 |
Coordinator
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Maassluis, Zuid-Holland, Netherlands
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I think I never managed to score a perfect 1.
I should have known that Subby would beat George W. Bush, that a dog would beat a horse, and let's not even think of why I mentioned a whip or why I do not know what 'cunt' means...
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* 2005 Golden Scribe winner for best FOF Dynasty about IHOF's Maassluis Merchantmen * Former GM of GEFL's Houston Oilers and WOOF's Curacao Cocktail |
06-14-2005, 07:36 AM | #13 | |
lolzcat
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Annapolis, Md
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Quote:
But you didn't try as hard as this. |
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06-14-2005, 10:59 AM | #14 | |
Grizzled Veteran
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: St. Louis
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Quote:
American women are really fond of the word cunt, ask the next one you run into what it means. |
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