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Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty

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Old 06-01-2019, 04:26 PM   #1
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Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty

This rebuild will be fun (sarcasm alert). It’s derived from BlackJackXXI Sports YouTube/Twitch series where he basically made an impossible rebuild for himself with the Festivus College Jokers. He has many house rules and a terrible starting team that results in YEARS of misery from his team. I have modified some house rules and made up some of my own.

I’ve also taken from his book and renamed every single player to some type of funny or ironic name. As for the recruits coming in for years to come you guys will have a chance to have your very own player. More on that later in the season.

As for the house rules, here they are:
Scheduling:
Until I reach three star prestige I must schedule five preseason top twenty five opponents and have a Strength of Schedule of at least an A.
Once I reach three star prestige I only need to play three preseason top twenty five opponents and have a Strength of Schedule of at least a B+.

Recruiting:
I can only recruit at my prestige level or lower.
I can only recruit JUCOs who are interested in me before targeting them until I get to a two star prestige.
(Made prior to Season Three): I can go after three JUCOs not interested in us originally throughout the year.

Coaching:
If my coach gets fired I must make a new coach to take over at the school. The coach progression rating is set at slow, so recruiting will be extremely hard each year because of this rule.
While in a game, if I go down by twenty five plus points I have to sim the rest of the game.
(Made prior to Season Three): My head coach only has to take another head coaching job if they are a prestige higher than us.

Now it’s time to meet your Rhode Island Tech Crawfish (With proper pronunciations as well):
QB:
66 OVR (RS) FR #3 Kingsly Harbord - QB/1 (Kings-Lee, Harbored)
64 OVR SO #10 Vincent Lemawnoper - QB/2 (Lemon-‘Nope’ with ‘R’ sound at end)
63 OVR (RS) FR #6 Olivieren Winkersonsman - QB/3 (‘O’-’Live’ like 'Live in a house'-’E’-Air-‘En’ like ‘Send’, Wink-‘er’ like ‘Her’-suns-man)
RB:
68 OVR JR #22 Axel Rod - RB/1
64 OVR(RS) SR #35 Chet Dreedo - RB/2 (Read with ’D’ at beginning and ‘O’ at end)
63 OVR (RS) SO #5 Berevian Cinculous - RB/3 (‘Ber’ like ‘Her’-E-V-‘En’ like ‘Enter’,Seen-Q-‘Lust’ without the ‘T’ sound)
56 OVR SO #24 Pikaroo Oofsey - RB/4 (Pick-Uh-Roo, Oof+See)
53 OVR FR #33 Manahewey YoYo Jr. - RB/5 (‘Man’ like the Spanish word ‘Mano’-‘E’ like ‘shed’-Hue-E)
FB:
61 OVR SR #38 Hambel Jibilator - FB (Ham-Bell, ‘Jib’ like ‘Jif’-Ill-Ate-Or)
WR:
61 OVR SR #81 Newman Triffler - WR/1 (Try-‘Flurry’ without the ‘Y’)
60 OVR SR #13 Jingle Jangle - WR/2
59 OVR JR #83 Xavionathon Cortacious - WR/3 (Zavion-Uh-’Thon’ like ’Thunder’, Core-Tay-Sh-Us)
59 OVR SR #18 Thischick Coo - WR/4 (This-chick, ‘Cool’ without the ‘L’)
59 OVR SO #1 Stryphing Adamsmanson - WR/5 (Str-Eye-Fing)
57 OVR SR #2 Engredipus Derellie - WR/6 (‘En’ like ‘Enter’-Gr-Ed-‘I’ like ‘Igloo’-’Pus’ like ‘Platypus’, Duh-‘Re’ like ‘Read’-Lee)
56 OVR (RS) SO #82 St. John Allenfrod - WR/7 (Allen-Fraud)
55 OVR (RS) FR #8 Jaether Fortuition - WR/8 (Jay-Th-‘Er’ like ‘Her’, For+Tuition)
55 OVR (RS) JR #13 Senator Adersons - WR/9 (Ad-‘Er’ like ‘Her’-Sons)
TE:
65 OVR (RS) SR #88 Howard G. Pepperoni - TE/1
55 OVR JR #85 Ipsy Graperpaper - TE/2 ‘Ip’ like ‘If’-See, Grape-‘Er’ like ‘Her’-Paper)
51 OVR FR #89 Kawhis Laugh - TE/3 (‘Kawhi’s’ like ‘Kawhi’ Leonard)
LT:
65 OVR (RS) SR #69 Ha Lol - LT/1 (Sounds like how you would text it)
57 OVR (RS) SO #59 Torbulan Edathion - LT/2 (Tore-‘Blue’ without the ‘L’ sound-‘Land’ without the ‘D’ sound, Ed-A-Th-E-‘On’ like ‘Son’)
54 OVR (RS) FR Iolapen Kiwiwi - LT/3 (I-O-Lap-‘En’ like ‘End’, Kiwi plus an extra ‘wi’)
LG:
61 OVR SR #72 Harold Biggumsman - LG/1 (Big-Ums-Man)
58 OVR (RS) SO #74 Heteritaria Forebois - LG/2 (‘He’ like ‘Hen’-‘Ter’ like ’inter’-‘I’ like ‘Igloo’-‘Tear’ like ‘Tear out hair’-E-Uh, For-Boi; the ‘S’ is silent)
C:
65 OVR JR #65 Captain Jiggyigyigy - C/1
56 OVR (RS) SO #63 Brosephine Jones - C/2 (Bro-‘Said’ without the ‘D’ sound-Ph-‘En’ like Lean’)
RG:
54 OVR SO #79 Gregacious Fartacious - RG/1 (Greg-A-Sh-Us, Fart-A-Sh-Us)
53 OVR FR #62 Aviato Taco - RG/2 (The sound you make when you scream-V-Auto)
RT:
65 OVR JR #68 Charquitric Gragers - RT/1 (Char-Qu-’I’ like ‘Igloo’-Trick, ‘Rag’ with ‘G’ in front-Ers like ‘Thunders’)
65 OVR (RS) SO #67 Frosty D. Snowman - RT/2
53 OVR SO #77 Ostrich Blupper - RT/3 (Bl-’U’ like ‘Up’-Per)
LE:
66 OVR SR #96 Yb Gnathl - LE/1 (‘Ib’ like ‘Bib’, ‘Nath’ like ‘Nash’ but with a ‘th’ sound instead of a ‘sh’ sound; the ‘G’ and ‘L’ are silent)
56 OVR SO #95 Portianale Scandinavio - LE/2 (Portion-Ale, Scan-Din-A-V-O)
54 OVR SR #55 Dafoil Narcot - LE/3 (Duh-Foil, ‘Nar’ like ‘Narcissist’-ko; The ‘t’ is silent)
RE:
68 OVR SO #90 Borous Chincky - RE/1 (Bore-Us, Ch-Ink-E)
66 OVR (RS) SR #93 Freciomar Damubig - RE/2 (Free-C-O-Mar, Dam-You-Big)
64 OVR (RS) JR #54 Veruvio Juwaan - RE/3 (‘Ver’ like ‘Per’-’U’ like ‘Blue’-V-O, ‘Ju’ like ‘Jew’-’Wan’ like ‘Juan’)
DT:
63 OVR SO #97 Hinsickle Albatraz - DT/1 (‘Him’ with ‘N’ instead of ‘M’-Sickle, Just sound out last name.)
62 OVR (RS) SO #99 Thicwandras Buttandro - DT/2 (Thick-‘Wan’ like ’Wander’-Dr-Us, Butt-’Un’ like Thunder’-Dr-O)
58 OVR SO #98 Zeebo Supreme - DT/3 (Z-Bow)
57 OVR JR #66 Slaftro Zorkele - DT/4 (‘Slaf’ like ‘Slab’-‘tro’ like ‘intro’, ‘Snorkel’ but with a ‘Z’ sound instead of a ‘Sn’ sound)
53 OVR (RS) FR #92 Rinlein Roadae - DT/5 (‘Rin’ like ‘Erin’-Lane, Row+Day)
LOLB:
69 OVR JR #58 Wannamaker Mine - LOLB/1 (‘Wan’ like ‘Wander’-Uh-Make-’ur’ like ‘Burrow’)
67 OVR SO #53 Drolexander Kreaman - LOLB/2 (Dr-All-‘Exander’ like ‘Alexander’, Cr-E-Man)
59 OVR (RS) SO #49 Jamengro Platyproton - LOLB/3 (Juh-Men-Grow, ‘Platy’ like ‘Platypus’-Proton)
59 OVR (RS) FR #47 Talley Sungorden - LOLB/4 (Tally, Sung-Or-Den)
MLB:
62 OVR SR #56 Firehydrant Larry - MLB/1
61 OVR FR #50 Ronsono Owowo - MLB/2 (Ron-Sun-O, O-Woah-Woah)
61 OVR JR #57 Hobele Yeppers - LB/MLB/3 (Hoe-Be-Lee, ‘Yep’ like in a text-’ers’ like ‘Thunders’)
ROLB:
65 OVR (RS) JR #61 R’Kala Yobie - ROLB/1 (Are-Call-Uh, Yo-Be)
59 OVR SO #51 Prongo Quackenduck - ROLB/2 (Sound out the first name, Quack-‘En’ like ‘Enter’-Duck)
58 OVR (RS) FR #42 Theorety Plazey - ROLB/3 (Th-E-O-‘Re’ like ‘Red’-Tee, Pl-‘Aw’ like ‘Claw’-Z)
57 OVR (RS) FR #45 Hitt DeQuan - ROLB/4 (Hit, D-Quan)
CB:
57 OVR SR #11 Salamander Feendoor - CB/1 (Fiend+door)
54 OVR (RS) SR #21 Lonko Friscalion - CB/2 (Lonzo but ‘K’ instead of ‘Z’, Frisk-Alley-’un’ like ’Thunder’)
54 OVR (RS) SR #25 Indigo Farquacia - CB/3 (Far-Qu-Aye-Sh-Uh)
52 OVR FR #29 Inckling Spotch - CB/4 (Ink-Ling, ‘Spotch’ like ‘Botch’ but with a ‘Sp’ sound instead of ‘B’)
52 OVR SO #26 Trecio Jordan - CB/5 (Tree-C-O)
51 OVR (RS) SR #28 Ofrencic Hynister - CB/6 (Off-’Ren’ like ‘Hen’-Sick, ‘Hin’ like ‘Sin’-Is-’Ter’ like ‘Her)
FS:
68 OVR JR #32 Yoinkers McGee - FS/1 (’Oink’ with a ’Y’ sound in front-’Her’s’ without the ’H’)
67 OVR JR #37 Dresmand Koala - FS/2 (Desmond with an ‘R’)
60 OVR FR #20 Tricer Deviano - SS/3 (Try-‘Her’ but with a ‘C’ instead of an ‘H’, Dev-E-On-O)
SS:
62 OVR JR #39 Fredrick Appletone XII - SS/1 (Fred+Rick, Apple-Ton)
53 OVR FR #9 Phlackalen Giorgion - SS/2 (Flack-uh-’len’ like Alex Len, Gee-Or-Gee-‘Un’ like ‘Thunder’)
K:
72 OVR (RS) SO #94 John Johnson - K/1
P:
74 OVR (RS) SO #91 Wally Marty - P/1 (Wall Mart with ‘Y’ sound at end of both)

If there are any questions about the pronunciations, or if you have suggestions, let me know. If you’re excited, then let’s get it!

Week Two at #4 Wisconsin: Sunday
__________________
Check Out My Dynasties:
Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty
Starting Over - A Cleveland Cavs Start Today MyLeague
The Fall and Rise of Ohio State Basketball

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Old 06-01-2019, 04:27 PM   #2
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Re: Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty

Schedule:

2013:
Spoiler


2014:
Spoiler


2015:
Spoiler
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Check Out My Dynasties:
Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty
Starting Over - A Cleveland Cavs Start Today MyLeague
The Fall and Rise of Ohio State Basketball

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Old 06-01-2019, 04:28 PM   #3
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Re: Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty

End of Season:

2013:
Spoiler


2014:
Spoiler

Last edited by IBMA; 07-22-2019 at 08:41 PM.
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Old 06-01-2019, 04:28 PM   #4
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Re: Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty

Team Records:

Passing
Spoiler


Rushing:
Spoiler


Receiving:
Spoiler


Defensive:
Spoiler
__________________
Check Out My Dynasties:
Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty
Starting Over - A Cleveland Cavs Start Today MyLeague
The Fall and Rise of Ohio State Basketball

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Old 06-01-2019, 04:29 PM   #5
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Re: Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty

Rhode Island Tech Hall of Fame:

2013 Inductees:
Spoiler


2014 Inductees:
Spoiler
__________________
Check Out My Dynasties:
Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty
Starting Over - A Cleveland Cavs Start Today MyLeague
The Fall and Rise of Ohio State Basketball

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Old 06-02-2019, 04:39 PM   #6
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Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty

Thriller In Madison Sees Badgers Slip By

September 7

Rhode Island Tech -- 31
#4 Wisconsin -- 38

What a first half! Rhode Island Tech goes into halftime up seven! I did not think I would get a lead this early in the dynasty, especially not against the number four ranked team. The whole time I was thinking two things: Eventually we’ll lose it and what happened to my settings. I swear I checked multiple times and they are the same settings as the first post! Incredible start from Kingsley Harbord, two TDs along with 153 yards. Axel Rod also having a nice first half, averaging 6.9 yards per carry. Borous Chincky, our best player not including special teams, has five tackles, three tackles for loss, and two sacks! In the first half! Amazing!

The second half was looking just as good. The offense seemed like it could keep moving and the defense had the bend, don’t break mentality, and it was going perfectly. But those danged Badgers were just too good for us. Overall that might be the best performance we get out of this team for a long time in this dynasty. I was proud of everyone, and hopefully the momentum carries into next week versus Fresno State.

Team Stats:
Rhode Island Tech:

Rushes - Yards - TDs: 30 - 153 - 1
Passing Yards - TDs: 244 - 3
Total Offense: 397
3rd Down Conversion: 6-11 (54%)
4th Down Conversion: 0-0 (0%)
2 Point Conversion: 0-0 (0%)
Red Zone - TD - FG: 5 - 4 - 1
INT - Fumbles Lost: 1 - 0

Wisconsin:
Rushes - Yards - TDs: 31 - 185 - 3
Passing Yards - TDs: 269 - 2
Total Offense: 454
3rd Down Conversion: 6-12 (50%)
4th Down Conversion: 0-0 (0%)
2 Point Conversion: 0-0 (0%)
Red Zone - TD - FG: 5 - 3 - 1
INT - Fumbles Lost: 0 - 0

Player Stats:
Rhode Island Tech:
Passing:

Kingsly Harbord: 23-38, 244 YDS, 3 TDs, INT, 60% Comp.
Rushing:
Axel Rod: 14-74, TD
Kingsly Harbord: 11-64
Receiving:
Thischick Coo: 5-55
Newman Triffler: 4-43
Stryphing Adamsmanson: 4-73
Howard G. Pepperoni: 2-7, 2 TDs
Defensive:
R’Kala Yobie: 8 TACK, 1 TFL
Borous Chincky: 7 TACK, 3 TFL, 2 SACK, 1 FF
Yb Gnathl: 4 TACK, 3 TFL

Wisconsin:
Passing:

Alex Hornibrook: 20-31, 269 YDS, 2 TDs, 64% Comp.
Rushing:
Jonathan Taylor: 20-134, 3 TDs
Alex Hornibrook: 11-51
Receiving:
Danny Davis III: 7-66
Jonathan Taylor: 5-76
A.J. Taylor: 3-71, TD
Jake Ferguson: 2-16, TD
Kendric Pryor: 2-36
Defensive:
T.J. Edwards: 7 TACK, 3 TFL
Ryan Connelly: 6 TACK, TFL
Andrew Van Ginkel: 6 TACK, TFL

IMG_0082.JPG
Kingsly Harbord passes to Howard G. Pepperoni for the first touchdown in
Rhode Island Tech history.

IMG_0084.JPG
Jonathan Taylor runs in untouched to tie the game at 14.

IMG_0087.jpg
Howard G. Pepperoni makes three guys miss to score his second TD of the game.

IMG_0089.JPG
D’Cota Dixon gets a clutch interception late in the game.

IMG_0092.jpg
Jonathan Taylor gets in with two seconds left to win the game against the Crawfish.

Week Three at Fresno State: Tuesday
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Check Out My Dynasties:
Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty
Starting Over - A Cleveland Cavs Start Today MyLeague
The Fall and Rise of Ohio State Basketball

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Old 06-04-2019, 06:48 PM   #7
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Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty

Crawfish Lose In Bad Fashion

September 14

Rhode Island Tech -- 15
Fresno State -- 49

This first half wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t nearly as good as last week. This is mainly evident in the offense, as between the unusable running game and the terrible performance from Kingsly Harbord, but the defense hasn’t looked much better. Still, only giving up fourteen points thus far has kept us in the game. It’s only 14-7, so it’s still manageable.

And then the second half was abysmal. Kingsly Harbord did step it up in the second half, but it wasn’t enough as we are just a bad team. The defense just couldn’t hold with lack of speed, agility, awareness, tackling, and coverage skills we will flat out won’t be able to compete. Last week seemed to be a fluke. 49-15 against Fresno State is just terrible, though. More is expected next week versus Boston College.

Team Stats:
Rhode Island Tech:

Rushes - Yards - TDs: 31 - 18 - 2
Passing Yards - TDs: 248 - 0
Total Offense: 266
3rd Down Conversion: 7-20 (35%)
4th Down Conversion: 1-1 (100%)
2 Point Conversion: 0-1 (0%)
Red Zone - TD - FG: 5 - 2 - 0
INT - Fumbles Lost: 2 - 0

Fresno State:
Rushes - Yards - TDs: 36 - 238 - 5
Passing Yards - TDs: 303 - 2
Total Offense: 541
3rd Down Conversion: 4-10 (40%)
4th Down Conversion: 0-0 (0%)
2 Point Conversion: 0-0 (0%)
Red Zone - TD - FG: 4 - 3 - 0
INT - Fumbles Lost: 0 - 1

Player Stats:
Rhode Island Tech:
Passing:

Kingsly Harbord: 25-48, 248 YDS, 2 INT, 52% Comp.
Rushing:
Axel Rod: 13-35, TD
Chet Dreedo: 5-7, TD
Receiving:
Jingle Jangle: 7-73
Stryphing Adamsmanson: 6-75
Howard G. Pepperoni: 5-47
Defensive:
Yoinkers McGee: 8 TACK
Fredrick Appletone XII & Firehydrant Larry: 5 TACK, TFL, SACK each
Yb Gnathl: 5 TACK, 3 TFL, SACK
Hinsickle Albatraz: 4 TACK, 3 TFL, 2 SACK

Fresno State:
Passing:

Marcus McMaryion: 15-19, 264 YDS, 2 TD, 78% Comp.
Rushing:
Josh Hokit: 11-181, 3 TDs
Marcus McMaryion: 19-33, 2 TDs
Receiving:
Jamire Jordan: 5-146, 2 TDs
Delvon Hardaway: 4-41
Michiah Quick: 3-60
Defensive:
Jasad Haynes: 7 TACK, 2 TFL, SACK
Wylan Free: 6 TACK, 2 TFL, 2 SACK, 2 INT
Kevin Atkins: 5 TACK, 4 TFL, 2 SACK
Matthew Boateng & Jeffrey Allison: 5 TACK, TFL each

IMG_0096.JPG
Josh Hokit falls in for the Fresno State touchdown.

IMG_0097.JPG
Not one, not two, but three times now for Josh Hokit!

IMG_0098.JPG
The Craws look for something on offense with an Axel Rod TD carry.

Week Four vs. Boston College: Wednesday
__________________
Check Out My Dynasties:
Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty
Starting Over - A Cleveland Cavs Start Today MyLeague
The Fall and Rise of Ohio State Basketball

Last edited by IBMA; 07-22-2019 at 03:02 PM.
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Old 06-05-2019, 02:08 AM   #8
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Re: Let's Go Craws! An Impossible Rhode Island Tech Dynasty

Love the idea!
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