jokes (not meant to offend)

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  • X*Cell
    Collab: xcellnoah@gmail
    • Sep 2002
    • 8107

    #16
    Re: jokes (not meant to offend)

    Originally posted by Vince
    I like this one...






    A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says, "You can't bring that dog in here."

    "You don't understand," says the man. "This is no regular dog, he can talk."

    "Listen, pal," says the bartender. "If that dog can talk, I'll give you a hundred bucks."

    The man puts the dog on a stool, and asks him, "What's on top of a house?"

    "Roof!"

    "Right. And what's on the outside of a tree?"

    "Bark!"

    "And who's the greatest baseball player of all time?"

    "Ruth!"

    "I guess you've heard enough," says the man. "I'll take the hundred in twenties."

    The bartender is furious. "Listen, pal," he says, "get out of here before I belt you."

    As soon as they're on the street, the dog turns to the man and says, "Do you think I should have said 'DiMaggio'?"
    Better version that had me on the floor:

    Linkage
    SAN ANTONIO SPURS

    Comment

    • Jitters_1981
      Rookie
      • Apr 2006
      • 174

      #17
      Re: jokes (not meant to offend)

      Hehe, the dog joke is pretty good. Anyone else have any jokes or funny pics? I am suprised how rare the brawls are considering how many players get hit by pitches. I know I would snap and limp to the mound if I got hit by a pitch considering how hard those balls are thrown. My wife works with a guy that played and was gonna play college ball but got hit in his elbow by a pitch and had to kiss his future career goodbye. That guy woulda deserved to get hit a few good times.

      Comment

      • AugustWest71
        Pro
        • Dec 2004
        • 584

        #18
        Re: jokes (not meant to offend)

        Here's a baseball joke I heard in middle school, and for some reason I still remember it.

        Two best friends (Joe and Frank) are huge baseball fans. They make a vow to each other that whoever dies first will come back as a ghost and tell the other if there's baseball in heaven. Joe dies first (ran over by a semi) and comes back as a ghost a few months later to tell Frank if there's baseball in heaven. Joe says to Frank, "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is there is baseball in heaven, the bad news is you're pitching tomorrow."

        Comment

        • Blzer
          Resident film pundit
          • Mar 2004
          • 42524

          #19
          Re: jokes (not meant to offend)

          Originally posted by Macar91
          Not a joke, but the top 10 brawls in MLB history.



          My fav is the Chan Ho one.
          Makes me miss the old Sportscenter look.
          Samsung PN60F8500 PDP / Anthem MRX 720 / Klipsch RC-62 II / Klipsch RF-82 II (x2) / Insignia NS-B2111 (x2) / SVS PC13-Ultra / SVS SB-2000 / Sony MDR-7506 Professional / Audio-Technica ATH-R70x / Sony PS3 & PS4 / DirecTV HR44-500 / DarbeeVision DVP-5000 / Panamax M5400-PM / Elgato HD60

          Comment

          • rspencer86
            MIB Crew
            • Sep 2004
            • 8807

            #20
            Re: jokes (not meant to offend)

            Originally posted by Blzer
            Makes me miss the old Sportscenter look.
            Me too.

            The Chan Ho flying-spinning-kick had me rolling on the floor laughing. Man, that is great.

            -Ryan
            Ryan Spencer

            University of Missouri '09
            Twitter: @RyanASpencer

            Royals / Chiefs / Kings / Mizzou / Sporting KC


            PSN: MizzouTigerrr
            XBox: MizzouRhino

            Comment

            • nofearsp2007
              Banned
              • Feb 2005
              • 2432

              #21
              Re: jokes (not meant to offend)

              The Izzy one has got to be the funniest thing ive ever seen in a sports brawl.

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