Cat People - People who have more than two cats are most likely going to be weirdos. I'd say 95% chance, which is 33% higher than anyone who owns a cat period.
Bumpersticker People - If you have a ton of bumperstickers on your car, you're probably lame. And if you're a woman, you're probably really ugly. I don't know how many times I've passed a car that has "Redneck Bitch" or "Bitch Princess", "Spoiled", "Daddy's Little Girl", "Fallen Angel", or "Pimptress" and thought... "Overweight, Pasty and Dumb" would have been a much more appropriate sticker, and would have summed it all up in one, instead of an orgy of ridiculous stickers on the back of your Chevy Malibu with a lei dangling from your rearview mirror. If anyone steals that bumpersticker idea from me and starts selling it to make millions, I wouldn't be surprised.
Self-Describers - If you describe yourself a lot to other people who you just met, I'm almost 100% positive you will bother me. "All my friends say I'm a really ______ (funny, smart, creative, competitive, chill, etc) person once you get to know me better." Don't tell me how you act, just act that way and I will decide for myself. Or maybe next time just fill that ______ in with "annoying" and I will immediately agree with your statement. Kind of along the same lines as Bumpersticker People.
Swimtrunk Ballers - People who play basketball in their swimming trunks are most likely A) Terrible and B) Going to accidentally hurt you due to incompetency. Never once have I played a pickup game and seen the dude with Hawaiian flowers on his shorts completely tear the court up. They almost always foul on defense and have the absolutely ugliest two handed hipshot jumper you will ever see. If you're good and wanted to come play pickup ball against me and bet on the game and make a ton of money, wear swim trunks, because you will fool the hell out of me.
Does anybody else (ignorantly) judge some people completely on a first impression like I do?
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