"Today, my girlfriend and I were up late watching tv when an infomercial for "male enhancement" came on. I grabbed for my phone to make a call when my girlfriend said "O honey, dont buy that, it's okay that you're small." I was checking my voicemails. FML"
F My Life
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F My Life
I'm sure one of you has to have posted this before but someone sent it to me and it is pure comedy!
"Today, my girlfriend and I were up late watching tv when an infomercial for "male enhancement" came on. I grabbed for my phone to make a call when my girlfriend said "O honey, dont buy that, it's okay that you're small." I was checking my voicemails. FML""Never trust a big butt and a smile."-Ricky Bell
Check out www.sliderset.net
Currently Listening: The D.O.C.: No One Can Do It Better (evidence that rap music used to be good!)Tags: None -
Re: F My Life
I'm sure one of you has to have posted this before but someone sent it to me and it is pure comedy!
"Today, my girlfriend and I were up late watching tv when an infomercial for "male enhancement" came on. I grabbed for my phone to make a call when my girlfriend said "O honey, dont buy that, it's okay that you're small." I was checking my voicemails. FML"Streaming PC & PS5 games, join me most nights after 6:00pm ET on TwitchTV https://www.twitch.tv/shaunh20
or Tiktok https://www.tiktok.com/@shaunh741
My YouTube Vids: https://www.youtube.com/@OdoggyDogg/videos -
Re: F My Life
"Today, this really attractive woman that I've known for years told me that when I can have sex with her standing up, she'll have sex with me. I'm confined to a wheelchair. FML"
thats cold...lolI can't shave with my eyes closed, meaning each day I have to look at myself in the mirror and respect who I see.
I miss the old days of Operation Sports :(
Louisville Cardinals/St.Louis CardinalsComment
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Re: F My Life
It's been my home page for a couple weeks now. It is the single greatest site ever invented.Comment
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Re: F My Life
"Today, I submitted my picture to a rating website. It was rejected because I didn't clarify which person I was. The picture was of my dog and me. FML"
there are a lot of funny stuff on that site. wonder how much really happened to those poeple and how many are just making stuff up.Comment
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Re: F My Life
Today, I finished having sex with my girlfriend when she asked if I had started smoking weed again. I said yes and asked if she could smell it on me, since I had recently smoked. She replied, "The only time you can last this long is when you're high." FMLXBL: DTX3
PSN: DTX987
WII U: DodgerBlue760Comment
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Re: F My Life
Today, I was watching a documentary on The World's Fattest Man. Half way through the show the reported started talking about his girlfriend. The Fattest Man in the world has a girlfriend. I'm 21 an have never had a girlfriend. FML
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Re: F My Life
I posted on this site a long time ago, but they never put up my story. FML.Last edited by Blzer; 02-20-2009, 11:59 PM.Samsung PN60F8500 PDP / Anthem MRX 720 / Klipsch RC-62 II / Klipsch RF-82 II (x2) / Insignia NS-B2111 (x2) / SVS PC13-Ultra / SVS SB-2000 / Sony MDR-7506 Professional / Audio-Technica ATH-R70x / Sony PS3 & PS4 / DirecTV HR44-500 / DarbeeVision DVP-5000 / Panamax M5400-PM / Elgato HD60Comment
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Re: F My Life
"Today my lesbian sister enthusiastically showed me her new strap on. Not only does she get more girls than me, she now has a bigger penis too. FML"
I love this one below:
"Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML""Hard work beats talent, when talent isn't working hard.”Comment
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Re: F My Life
Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML
Today, in class my friend played a joke on me by pulling my seat from under me while i was about to sit. I fell and everybody laughed at me. During the next class i did the same thing to him, he broke his arm. He was the star of the basketball team, nobody laughed. FMLComment
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Re: F My Life
Today, I called my girlfriend and she answered telling me how amazing the sex was last night and she can't wait to see me later. I didn't see her last night. FMLFan of....
Memphis Tigers - Texas Rangers - Dallas Mavericks - Dallas Cowboys
Coaching Career of Chris Matthews (CH2k8)
The Legend of Ocho Ocho
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