2 part question for those with kids.

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  • Brandwin
    Hall Of Fame
    • Jul 2002
    • 30621

    #76
    Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

    I see where DC is coming from and like I said, everyone is different. We are all right in how we feel and how we want to raise our children.

    Like I said, if I had a son and he got a little older (my daughter is 7) I may not do that, who knows.

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    • Trevytrev11
      MVP
      • Nov 2006
      • 3259

      #77
      Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

      What about this?



      Sorry, link won't post as picture.

      Comment

      • Trevytrev11
        MVP
        • Nov 2006
        • 3259

        #78
        Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

        Originally posted by DC
        And this?
        So are you worried about what it looks like?

        I see two people that love eachother...Don't know who they are (gay lovers, father and son, brothers, friends), but they obviosly care for eachother. Obviously no one in the background of that picture seems to mind...why should I?

        Are you really comparing a picture of a father kissing his child to two grown men kissing?

        There you go using EXTREME's!
        Last edited by Trevytrev11; 10-19-2009, 11:59 AM.

        Comment

        • Brandwin
          Hall Of Fame
          • Jul 2002
          • 30621

          #79
          Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

          Originally posted by mgoblue

          I think my Dad did kisses on the cheek when i was really young, but as I got older we'd just hug...I dunno, even now I don't kiss my Dad on the cheek at all, we just hug if I was visiting and leaving...Moms are more for hugging and cheek kisses. I think it's just different for dad/son as they get older, before they're 5ish who cares...

          Can't imagine kissing either parent on the lips, I guess I associate that more as romantic/sexual vs. friendly.
          I agree. At a certain age, I think it needs to stop on the lips, even now it's not really a kiss on the lips. She will pucker up sometimes and I will kind of kiss the side. it just depends.

          Comment

          • DC
            Hall Of Fame
            • Oct 2002
            • 17996

            #80
            Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

            Originally posted by Trevytrev11
            So are you worried about what it looks like?

            I see two people that love eachother...Don't know who they are, but they obviosly care for eachother. Obviously no one in the background of that picture seems to mind...why should I?
            Aight I'm done. You are now condoning grown men kissing. I'm out. You win.
            Concrete evidence/videos please

            Comment

            • Trevytrev11
              MVP
              • Nov 2006
              • 3259

              #81
              Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

              Originally posted by DC
              Aight I'm done. You are now condoning grown men kissing. I'm out. You win.
              I'm not homophobic, if your asking. Not sure what this picture has to do with anything.

              This whole thread is about parents and kids and you show a picture of two grown men, what are you even getting at?

              Way to post a random picture, make no point what so ever to the topic at hand, then make some irrational statment about grown men kissing and then bounce on the thread.
              Last edited by Trevytrev11; 10-19-2009, 12:55 PM.

              Comment

              • ProStylez
                Goon Squad
                • Oct 2006
                • 1988

                #82
                Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

                To sum this whole topic up:
                1. If you kiss your kids on the lips you are either gay or not manly and your kids will be soft when they get older.
                2. On the other hand it's just love and not a big deal.

                1. If you shower with your kids they will be emotionally wounded with flashbacks of "meat" in their face.
                2. It's just a shower and nothing more but only up to a certain age.

                1. Black folks don't kiss their kids on the lips
                2. Everyone else does.

                It still seems to me whatever you do with your kids or don't do is up to you but it's the parents who are turning kids away from the kisses or showers due to something they feel is wrong or "gay" because it's definitely not the kids that are turning the parents away especially at such a young age. I'm all for tough love and being hard but not at such a young age.

                Comment

                • mgoblue
                  Go Wings!
                  • Jul 2002
                  • 25477

                  #83
                  Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

                  Originally posted by ProStylez
                  To sum this whole topic up:
                  1. If you kiss your kids on the lips you are either gay or not manly and your kids will be soft when they get older.
                  2. On the other hand it's just love and not a big deal.

                  1. If you shower with your kids they will be emotionally wounded with flashbacks of "meat" in their face.
                  2. It's just a shower and nothing more but only up to a certain age.

                  1. Black folks don't kiss their kids on the lips
                  2. Everyone else does.

                  It still seems to me whatever you do with your kids or don't do is up to you but it's the parents who are turning kids away from the kisses or showers due to something they feel is wrong or "gay" because it's definitely not the kids that are turning the parents away especially at such a young age. I'm all for tough love and being hard but not at such a young age.
                  I think it all just depends on age...It's fine when they're younger, but once they hit a certain age it's kinda sketchy. I remember an article about a mom who was still breastfeeding her kid at 8-10 and was saying "I'll stop whenever he wants to"...Pretty weird and I'm willing to bet that kid will have some sort of issues because of it.

                  Obviously that's more extreme, but just pointing out something I remember reading a while back.
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                  Comment

                  • Stumbleweed
                    Livin' the dream
                    • Oct 2006
                    • 6279

                    #84
                    Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

                    Naturally humans breastfeed until around age 4 or 5, FYI... only recently (relatively speaking) did it become unacceptable/undesirable for women to breastfeed once the kids have teeth. Kids raised with a longer breastfeeding schedule are almost without exception healthier and smarter. Cultural norms are influencing this discussion heavily, as evidenced by the race comments... interesting how different people handle these issues.

                    FWIW, my family is Mexican on my mom's side and white as hell on my Dad's side... my mom's side of the family kiss their kids (male or female) on the mouth almost without exception where as my dad's side normally doesn't unless they're really young. I would kiss my future kids if I felt like it -- it's just another way to show affection, don't really see what the problem is. That Kobe picture is cute -- little girls happy to see their father and him showing genuine affection with a kiss in public... good stuff. Kids trained to avoid contact and emotions grow up to hold things in... I'm glad I was raised in an emotionally open household and don't have hang-ups about kissing anyone if I wanted to.

                    The showering thing is more touchy mostly because of what other people would think if they found out, etc. -- there has been so much scaremongering about pedophiles in the last 20 years that's the first thing in people's minds when something like that comes up. I personally think it's fine, better that than showering with a bunch of classmates after football practice for me personally.. But yeah, it would start getting weird at some point... but really there's no arbitrary age line, just whenever the kid starts wanting their own privacy, asks too many detailed questions, etc. I don't judge anyone for doing that for sure -- again, it's just a closeness and familiarity that we have often lost both as parents/children/family and as people in general.

                    Many people can go entire days communicating via nothing but electronic means, nobody hugs anyone anymore, people's "word" is broken constantly because it's not what it once was, etc... I'm old school in a lot of ways, and these are things that people did with their children more often back in the day and I think it led to stronger family units. Before everyone was worried about looking gay or being seen as a pedophile when they have none of that intent, this stuff wouldn't even have come up -- you show affection for your kids as you want to. It's the affection that matters though, not the type of affection -- so DC and others who aren't comfortable with it, as long as you're still showing affection and care for your kids, there's no problem.
                    Last edited by Stumbleweed; 10-19-2009, 02:11 PM.
                    Send your Midnight Release weirdo pics/videos to my new website: http://www.peopleofmidnightreleases.com!

                    Comment

                    • mgoblue
                      Go Wings!
                      • Jul 2002
                      • 25477

                      #85
                      Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

                      Originally posted by Stumbleweed
                      Naturally humans breastfeed until around age 4 or 5, FYI... only recently (relatively speaking) did it become unacceptable/undesirable for women to breastfeed once the kids have teeth. Kids raised with a longer breastfeeding schedule are almost without exception healthier and smarter. Cultural norms are influencing this discussion heavily, as evidenced by the race comments... interesting how different people handle these issues.

                      FWIW, my family is Mexican on my mom's side and white as hell on my Dad's side... my mom's side of the family kiss their kids (male or female) on the mouth almost without exception where as my dad's side normally doesn't unless they're really young. I would kiss my future kids if I felt like it -- it's just another way to show affection, don't really see what the problem is. That Kobe picture is cute -- little girls happy to see their father and him showing genuine affection with a kiss in public... good stuff. Kids trained to avoid contact and emotions grow up to hold things in... I'm glad I was raised in an emotionally open household and don't have hang-ups about kissing anyone if I wanted to.
                      I wasn't raised in some emotionally closed household, just personally thought it was weird/gross to kiss my dad on the lips when I was 10...

                      Little kids it's all cool, just once they get older things change IMO. I don't think I'd kiss my mom on the lips now, maybe it's just a cultural thing, I dunno.
                      Nintendo Switch Friend Code: SW-7009-7102-8818

                      Comment

                      • KG
                        Welcome Back
                        • Sep 2005
                        • 17583

                        #86
                        Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

                        I always thought it was a little weird for parents to kiss their kids on the lips.

                        There are probably some underlying cultural aspects that come into play as well.
                        Twitter Instagram - kgx2thez

                        Comment

                        • Stumbleweed
                          Livin' the dream
                          • Oct 2006
                          • 6279

                          #87
                          Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

                          Originally posted by mgoblue
                          I wasn't raised in some emotionally closed household, just personally thought it was weird/gross to kiss my dad on the lips when I was 10...

                          Little kids it's all cool, just once they get older things change IMO. I don't think I'd kiss my mom on the lips now, maybe it's just a cultural thing, I dunno.
                          Yeah, that comes from school and society in general. If my kid didn't feel comfortable doing it and said something to me, I'd stop. I told my mom I didn't want her to kiss me when she dropped me off at school because I'd sometimes get **** for it from classmates -- still though, she'd kiss me at home and I was fine with it... I was about 9 when that happened I think. I kiss her on the mouth now though since that's not a concern. I kiss my aunts sometimes, always kissed my grandma(s). I kiss my Dad rarely, but it happens. Just the way it's always been I guess.

                          When it becomes a problem for the kid is when it's time to stop. The shower thing is more problematic in general, but the same rule applies to both in my view.
                          Send your Midnight Release weirdo pics/videos to my new website: http://www.peopleofmidnightreleases.com!

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                          • Pappy Knuckles
                            LORDTHUNDERBIRD
                            • Sep 2004
                            • 15966

                            #88
                            Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

                            There are many ways to show affection to a child, I don't see the point of kissing them on the mouth. Whether it was a son or daughter, I'm just not down with that. And as far as showering goes, there's no reason for your little girl to be looking at daddy's wee wee.

                            Comment

                            • MC Fatigue
                              Banned
                              • Feb 2006
                              • 4150

                              #89
                              Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

                              Originally posted by DC
                              Aight I'm done. You are now condoning grown men kissing. I'm out. You win.
                              You're right - he does win. He's an open minded person who doesn't act like he knows how everyone else should go about living their lives. He's full of win.

                              Comment

                              • Trevytrev11
                                MVP
                                • Nov 2006
                                • 3259

                                #90
                                Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

                                Originally posted by Pappy Knuckles
                                There are many ways to show affection to a child, I don't see the point of kissing them on the mouth. Whether it was a son or daughter, I'm just not down with that.
                                If the intent isn't sexual I don't see what the big deal is..if it is sexual one has far worse problems.

                                So I guess it comes down to whether one believes a kiss on the lips is always of a sexual connotation. I can see how people can see that it is, but for me it's not. When I give my wife a peck on the lips before I head out the door or when I see her at night after work, there is nothing sexual behind it. It's a sign of endearment and love to someone I care about just as much as my daughter.

                                I guess it comes down to what a kiss means to each person. For me there is a difference between an endearing and inncocent peck on the cheek and the romantic kiss I give my life when I want to get some action.

                                There is also a difference in the way I hug her when she is sad to when we are happy to when we are intimate. Or a differnent way I touch her when we're among others or when we are in our bedroom....and I don't think theres ever been any confusion between any of these between either of us or anyone that has witnessed it.

                                It's funny, before this thread, I never would have thought anyone thought otherwise about a simple kiss to a child. I just thought hugging and kissing your child was a natural part of being a loving parent and expressing your love to ones family.
                                Last edited by Trevytrev11; 10-19-2009, 03:20 PM.

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