Suicide

[ryan36]

Ok , so I have just recently been re- engaging facebook... A girl who I went to HS went lost her bf about a week ago (as in missing person)...I feel awkward cause I haven't talked to her in 10 years. But, her boyfriend turned up having taken his own life in a park...I've been struggling with what to put on her facebook for a day, and now nothing seems right so I'm leaving it alone. Have any of you ever been involved w/someone who's taken their own life? PM me if you want , I'd love to talk

[allBthere]

Re: Suicide

just my opinion, but the only appropriate thing as far as I'm concerned is a private mssg with condolences. No wall crap, it diminishes what's happened and isn't respectful.

[ryan36]

Re: Suicide

Yah, I can probably agree with that. I just don't know about "e-generation" ettiquette..it's shaken me up and I never had met the guy

[Bellsprout]

Re: Suicide

I wouldn't do anything. I'd feel sort of insulted if someone who hadn't talked to me in 10 years decided to patronize me with a condolence message now. Almost as if they were saying to me "it took someone close to you dying for me to care what's happening in your life."

Most people probably don't feel that way, but i'm wired sort of differently.

[z Revis]

Re: Suicide

I wouldn't do anything. I'd feel sort of insulted if someone who hadn't talked to me in 10 years decided to patronize me with a condolence message now. Almost as if they were saying to me "it took someone close to you dying for me to care what's happening in your life."

Most people probably don't feel that way, but i'm wired sort of differently.

That's what I was thinking too. You haven't talked to her in 10 years, why talk to her now? You obviously don't care much for her since you haven't spoken to her in that long. No reason to say anything now. I know if I were in her shoes and you tried to give me good wishes or say you're sorry for what happened, I'd be a little offended.

[Jonesy]

Re: Suicide

I wouldn't do anything. I'd feel sort of insulted if someone who hadn't talked to me in 10 years decided to patronize me with a condolence message now. Almost as if they were saying to me "it took someone close to you dying for me to care what's happening in your life."

Most people probably don't feel that way, but i'm wired sort of differently.

I think the same. If you were in regular contact with the girl i would go with allBthere's advice but if you haven't been in regular contact it's prob just best to let it be imo.

My cousin tried to commit suicide about 2 years ago. She was the most happy, bubbly girl you would ever meet then suddenly everything went downhill and she started locking herself in her room with no lights / tv on etc and it all escalated untill she tried to slit her wrists. Thankfully she didn't die and seems to be slowly back on the mend with the help of professional counsellors and a loving family but it was bloody scary!

They ended up figuring out it was linked to post traumatic stress from a holdup at the bank she worked at.

[ryan36]

Re: Suicide

Yeah, that's just it...that's why I didn't say anything. Thx guys, it didn't seem my place

[Aso21Raiders]

Re: Suicide

Why don't you just talk to her and not talk about her dead boyfriend.

[jeremym480]

Re: Suicide

Ok , so I have just recently been re- engaging facebook... A girl who I went to HS went lost her bf about a week ago (as in missing person)...I feel awkward cause I haven't talked to her in 10 years. But, her boyfriend turned up having taken his own life in a park...I've been struggling with what to put on her facebook for a day, and now nothing seems right so I'm leaving it alone. Have any of you ever been involved w/someone who's taken their own life? PM me if you want , I'd love to talk

Was her boyfriend Boner from Growing Pains?

[Buckeyes_Doc]

Re: Suicide

Why don't you just talk to her and not talk about her dead boyfriend.

How far would that go? Hey how are you doing? What is her response going to be to that?

This isn't the best time to talk to her.

[mkharsh33]

Re: Suicide

Why don't you just talk to her and not talk about her dead boyfriend.

this would be a REALLY bad move... best to just leave it alone.

[Qb]

Re: Suicide

Was her boyfriend Boner from Growing Pains?

Not to make light of someone's death, but that was the first thing I thought of as well... weird.

[CWSapp757]

Re: Suicide

Well, I feel that speaking to her now would be a bad idea. But I don't think that it would be a bad idea to converse with her in the future in an attempt to rebuild the friendship. I would talk to her months down the line. That way, if she wants to talk about the situation, you will be there for her and it won't be a forced, awkward type of thing.

[Watson]

Re: Suicide

Not to hijack this thread, but i'm in sort of the same situation.

2 1/2 years ago my bible study teacher injured his back trying to lift some heavy machinery in a plant. He couldn't use his back for anything so he took a small pay cut and a desk job. Everyday he'd come home and just crash on the bed, getting up only to use the bathroom, eat supper, and to move to the recliner when there was company. Still, every Sunday, he got up, drove to church, and did the bible study. He couldn't stay for church because sitting in the chairs was too uncomfortable for him. His back just kept getting worse and worse. When he driving his sons home from school one day in August, he got into a fender bender. I guess that was the straw that broke the camels back, no pun intended. He was terribly bedridden. Anyway, he couldn't work and 2 weekends ago he got up in the middle of the night, went to the garage, and hung himself.

His family is still in shock, obviously, but his sons want to come back to Church. I have some idea of what to say. (we had to go to that stupid counseling thing. woo) The kids are pretty smart, they know why he did it, but that doesn't help it out any. They know that they'll get "counselor talk" and I don't want to be that guy that's overly obvious with it.

[z Revis]

Re: Suicide

Not to hijack this thread, but i'm in sort of the same situation.

2 1/2 years ago my bible study teacher injured his back trying to lift some heavy machinery in a plant. He couldn't use his back for anything so he took a small pay cut and a desk job. Everyday he'd come home and just crash on the bed, getting up only to use the bathroom, eat supper, and to move to the recliner when there was company. Still, every Sunday, he got up, drove to church, and did the bible study. He couldn't stay for church because sitting in the chairs was too uncomfortable for him. His back just kept getting worse and worse. When he driving his sons home from school one day in August, he got into a fender bender. I guess that was the straw that broke the camels back, no pun intended. He was terribly bedridden. Anyway, he couldn't work and 2 weekends ago he got up in the middle of the night, went to the garage, and hung himself.

His family is still in shock, obviously, but his sons want to come back to Church. I have some idea of what to say. (we had to go to that stupid counseling thing. woo) The kids are pretty smart, they know why he did it, but that doesn't help it out any. They know that they'll get "counselor talk" and I don't want to be that guy that's overly obvious with it.

Wow that's sad. He couldn't have gone to the doctor or something?