Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

[55]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Um, I can think of a reason to get married, even if I wasn't having kids.

Not a logical one.

That's about the only way I can explain anything anymore

If that's true, then... wow...

I'd elaborate more, but I can't here for obvious reasons.

[msuduo]

If that's true, then... wow...

I'd elaborate more, but I can't here for obvious reasons.

Good for you. Keep it to yourself

[Fly3]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Haha, I knew 55 wouldn't be able to resist.

[baumy300]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Don't read this if you're paying for a life coach.

Spoiler

I think that people who actually hire "life coaches" are tools.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Leave religion and belittling comments out of this thread.

Thanks.

[12]

Leave religion and belittling comments out of this thread.

Thanks.

Please forgive me here, Matrix... I am not trying to be a smart ***.

But is it really considered 'religion' here when someone expresses a personal belief in God?

[kehlis]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Please forgive me here, Matrix... I am not trying to be a smart ***.

But is it really considered 'religion' here when someone expresses a personal belief in God?

Not trying to speak for Matrix but to me it's okay to express a belief one way or the other.

The problem comes when a poster responds to that belief and questions it. That is when discussing religion becomes a problem and this thread shows why.

[8]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Ok guys I've been debating posting this and I'm in a rare mood to do so. So here it goes. I have alopecia, which is an autoimmune disorder which causes the immune system to attack hair follicles, there is no cure but most cases go away as people get older. Not for me though. So basically I will get circular patches on my head where hair wont grow, some spots stick around for years others for months, so it comes and goes. I was somewhat lucky in that it wasn't too bad when I was a kid growing up through school, I got good at hiding it too. But recently it was getting so bad that about a year ago I decided to just shave my head. Luckily I have a decent shaped head. The only problem is that the alopecia has taken my eyebrows as well as my facial hair. So yeah that can look kind of strange. It's not too bad when I have a tan but in the winter I feel I look pretty freaky. It's not too bad though, I wear a hat pretty much everywhere except for work. I'm 32 and married now so I'd like to say I don't give a **** what other people think I look like but that's not always the case. Well enough of that, I better hit submit before I change my mind.

[Bmore Irish]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Ok guys I've been debating posting this and I'm in a rare mood to do so. So here it goes. I have alopecia, which is an autoimmune disorder which causes the immune system to attack hair follicles, there is no cure but most cases go away as people get older. Not for me though. So basically I will get circular patches on my head where hair wont grow, some spots stick around for years others for months, so it comes and goes. I was somewhat lucky in that it wasn't too bad when I was a kid growing up through school, I got good at hiding it too. But recently it was getting so bad that about a year ago I decided to just shave my head. Luckily I have a decent shaped head. The only problem is that the alopecia has taken my eyebrows as well as my facial hair. So yeah that can look kind of strange. It's not too bad when I have a tan but in the winter I feel I look pretty freaky. It's not too bad though, I wear a hat pretty much everywhere except for work. I'm 32 and married now so I'd like to say I don't give a **** what other people think I look like but that's not always the case. Well enough of that, I better hit submit before I change my mind.

that's rough man, sounds like you handle it really well though. I can relate somewhat. I have psoriasis, so i get these red, scaly, splotchy patches of irritated skin on my body. mostly on my stomach and sides, though I've also had it on my head pretty bad before, and other places. It's been better lately, and I consider myself lucky to not have it on my face or anything, like some ppl do. But in HS i used to get so embarrassed in the locker room and especially in the summer at the beach or pool, because it's impossible not to notice and inevitably someone would ask me about it. I'm much better with it now, as I'm as close to not caring how it looks as is possible. I'm very fortunate though, as a google image search of psoriasis will show you just how bad it can be. My case is only moderate, but I sometimes wonder if having psoriasis is part of the reason I'm into tattoos. It's like my body is already marked and scarred forever with this skin disorder, so covering it with ink seems better. At least sun exposure can help alleviate it.

Anyway, hopefully that doesn't sound too whiny, there are definitely people on here who have shared things they are dealing with which are much more difficult and trying then what I'm talking about. just felt like i could relate to King's post.

[mgoblue]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Marriage is becoming a pretty outdated practice at this point. What do they say? More than half of marriages end in divorce anyway so all getting married does is make breaking up a lot more stressful, expensive and time consuming for everyone involved. The only logical benefits of getting married, at least in my opinion, would be for medical insurance benefits if one half of the couple didn't work or something. Also, it would be beneficial as far as leaving an estate if one half of the couple died unexpectedly or something, although you can always have a living will and at that point marriage doesn't mean anything anyway.

I've been with my lady for around 8 years and neither of us have any desire to get married now, or at any point, to one another, or anybody else. So yeah, you are not alone. Don't let anyone... and 55 means ANYONE, try to tell you that you should get married just because of tradition, it's the right thing to do, etc. At the end of the day, it is just a piece of paper that costs thousands of dollars (depending on how sweet your wedding is) and doesn't really mean all that much in the grand scheme of things.

I'm going to disagree with you.

I do 100% agree that people shouldn't get married unless they really want to, and are prepared to make that commitment. Too many people nowadays get married without really knowing that person, and then when they're married they run into problems. Plus too many couples don't communicate well, which is crucial in a marriage.

I also think that divorce is seen as the "easy way out" nowadays, and people don't even try to stay together a lot of times.

Where I disagree is that there's no real reason to get married. IMO you're finding a partner for life to support you emotionally, mentally, etc and help you get farther in life. Plus if you want to have kids then a strong marriage will enable you to have a good family household to do that in. I see so many kids that are the victims of divorce and that takes a toll on them. Single parent households can be tough. That parent does everything they can, but it's not always possible.

I don't understand how people could have kids together, or promise to be around forever, when they're unable to commit to marriage.

[8]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

that's rough man, sounds like you handle it really well though. I can relate somewhat. I have psoriasis, so i get these red, scaly, splotchy patches of irritated skin on my body. mostly on my stomach and sides, though I've also had it on my head pretty bad before, and other places. It's been better lately, and I consider myself lucky to not have it on my face or anything, like some ppl do. But in HS i used to get so embarrassed in the locker room and especially in the summer at the beach or pool, because it's impossible not to notice and inevitably someone would ask me about it. I'm much better with it now, as I'm as close to not caring how it looks as is possible. I'm very fortunate though, as a google image search of psoriasis will show you just how bad it can be. My case is only moderate, but I sometimes wonder if having psoriasis is part of the reason I'm into tattoos. It's like my body is already marked and scarred forever with this skin disorder, so covering it with ink seems better. At least sun exposure can help alleviate it.

Anyway, hopefully that doesn't sound too whiny, there are definitely people on here who have shared things they are dealing with which are much more difficult and trying then what I'm talking about. just felt like i could relate to King's post.

I understand the bolded part completely. My thing was I played baseball the majority of my life and didn't really try other sports(with the exception of just playing with friends) because they didn't involve hats to hide the alopecia. Luckily I was pretty good at baseball. I would of loved to play organized football but taking off the helmet was a no go for me. It's also caused me to be super aware of my surroundings. You know how kids are, they would try and knock off peoples hats or steal them off someone's head. I saw that crap from a mile away and had ninja like reflexes.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Please forgive me here, Matrix... I am not trying to be a smart ***.

But is it really considered 'religion' here when someone expresses a personal belief in God?

What Kehlis said pretty much sums up my thoughts. Nipping it in the bud, basically.

[Pappy Knuckles]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Ok guys I've been debating posting this and I'm in a rare mood to do so. So here it goes. I have alopecia, which is an autoimmune disorder which causes the immune system to attack hair follicles, there is no cure but most cases go away as people get older. Not for me though. So basically I will get circular patches on my head where hair wont grow, some spots stick around for years others for months, so it comes and goes. I was somewhat lucky in that it wasn't too bad when I was a kid growing up through school, I got good at hiding it too. But recently it was getting so bad that about a year ago I decided to just shave my head. Luckily I have a decent shaped head. The only problem is that the alopecia has taken my eyebrows as well as my facial hair. So yeah that can look kind of strange. It's not too bad when I have a tan but in the winter I feel I look pretty freaky. It's not too bad though, I wear a hat pretty much everywhere except for work. I'm 32 and married now so I'd like to say I don't give a **** what other people think I look like but that's not always the case. Well enough of that, I better hit submit before I change my mind.

You're not alone man, I have it too. As a child it sucked because kids say the meanest stuff and ask the dumbest questions, but the older I got the less of an issue it became. My hair grows in patchy, so I just shave it. And and my facial hair and eyebrows are a bit on the thin side.

On top of that though I also have hyperhidrosis (exessive sweating), which is a hell of a lot more frustrating than alopecia ever was. It seems like most people I've come across with it have it in their palms, but mine is mostly on my scalp. Anytime i get a little bit hot I just start sweating bullets. I hate summer with a passion and tend not to do much outside when the sun starts to get too bad. Jobs I've had where I had to do any outdoor work has definitely sucked.

[PVarck31]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I have moderate Psoriasis as well. I have it a bit on the top of my hands, my elbows and my scalp. The scalp is by far the worst. I need to basically keep a buzz cut so I can put on this prescription foam. Its the only thing that will even come close to helping it. And if I miss more than a day or two it will start flaring up again. I pretty much wear a hat every time I go out because of it. When it gets dry in the winter and flared up, it itches so bad I have made my scalp bleed.

It really sucks, but there isn't much you can do about it.

[BDKiiing]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I started seeing a girl about a month and a half ago. We aren't really dating yet, but would/could/should be dating, we've just hung out a lot and like each other, haven't even fooled around or anything yet, just really bonded. I'm 100% sure she wants to date. But with only having 5 weeks left of school I seem to have some sort of reserves against it. Since she'll be going home for the summer and I'm staying at school. I don't know what it is, but I don't do distance well. But I want to be able to pick this back up in fall, as we'll actually be living close to each other (She's going to be an RA in a dorm that is like 200 feet away from the apartment I'm living in next year). Yet for some reason I just can't get myself to commit to anything right now, since I have no clue what summer will have in store.