How Often Should the Guy Pay?

[deaduck]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

There is nothing inherently wrong with a man who wants,offers, or is able to pay for all the dates....but there is a high social danger in a woman that expects him to and/or lets him.

Just my experience.

[DirtyJerz32]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

I paid for everything when my wife and I started dating. Then one day it happened... She paid for dinner and a movie, she just pulled out her card and paid without me saying a word. That's when I knew she was in it for the long haul.

Now we have joint accounts so it doesn't matter who pays...

IMO, if she's expecting you to pay all the time, she might not be the one.

[dsallupinyaarea]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

I pay for the first 3 dates for sure. After that, it's fair game.

[Fresh Tendrils]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

I don't think you can set a hard and fast rule, but its pretty easy to figure out when somebody is taking advantage of you and when they're not.

If you feel like you're being taken advantage of or its not "even" enough then maybe try some communication.

[GAMEC0CK2002]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

Blind dates or early on dates....I pay and expect to unless it's my birthday.

After that, just depends on how y'all do things. I would have a problem if every time you go out and she doesn't try to contribute anything. (ie. doesn't not even take her purse into the diner)

Make me a home cooked meal every now and then.

[C the Lyte]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

I'm 20. The guy always pays. There are three things a guy should do on a date:

1) Open doors (car doors do not apply IMO)
2) Refrain from cussing
3) Pay.

The only exception to the rule is your birthday, where splitting 60/40 or 70/30 or anything where the girl pays less than half is acceptable, but I pay even on my birthday.

The car doors DO apply.

[JODYE]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

First two or three dates, you pay for sure.

After that, if the woman isn't practical and not offering to buy, make you dinner or take YOU out, then on to the next one.

[55]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

I normally pay 100% of the time (besides my birthday) just because that's the way I like it. I hate driving (always have, always will) and never have to, so I figure it is common courtesy on my part if my girl drives us in her own car with her own gas so I can have a few drinks at dinner and not have to worry about driving home after. It's a fair trade IMO.

However, since being laid off back in November, my girl has paid about the same amount of times as I have and we even just split the bill sometimes. We've been together for 8 years though, so it's different situation than most.

[Watson]

The car doors DO apply.

Getting in, yes, getting out, no. Should have clarified.

I've never had the girl wait for me to open her door for her. Usually they get out as soon as I put it in park and kill the engine.

[SuperBowlNachos]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

I say it will also depend on how much she makes. If you are raking in the dough with no huge expenses and she is in school making $8 an hour I would always pay. If she is making $70,000 a year and expects you to always pay. Screw that.

[ProfessaPackMan]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

I don't think you can set a hard and fast rule, but its pretty easy to figure out when somebody is taking advantage of you and when they're not.

If you feel like you're being taken advantage of or its not "even" enough then maybe try some communication.

Yup.

And if you can't tell when someone is taking advantage of you, then maybe you shouldn't be in a relationship at that point.

First two or three dates, you pay for sure.

After that, if the woman isn't practical and not offering to buy, make you dinner or take YOU out, then on to the next one.

I'm pretty much on the same page as you. First 2-3 dates, I don't mind paying nor do I have a problem with paying. But I will say if they do offer to pay for SOME of it, then I also wouldn't necessarily turn them down either.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

I don't mind paying unless it's obvious that they're just trying to take advantage of you.

I think once things get more serious, it's thoroughly fine to split, or have her pick something up once in a while. At the very least, offer. I wouldn't let them most of the time, anyway.

And if you go away together and you're not engaged/married, I'd expect for costs to be generally split too.

[XtremeDunkz]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

guy pays until the comfort level sets in or she offers to pay, after that just try to alternate.

[UATide]

I'm 19 and have always paid when with a girl. I'm not loaded or anything, it's just how I was raised I guess. Not too big of a deal to me.

[Champion8877]

Re: How Often Should the Guy Pay?

If it is a girl I just started dating I would pay everytime, and even if she offered to pay I would I would probably say no thanks, I got it.

Now if we have been dating for a while and we are very comfortable with each other and serious, then I would let her pay here and there, but I would still pay for most of it myself.

Just the way I was taught I guess, guy always pays. I'm 18 by the way.