2 part question for those with kids.

[JohnnytheSkin]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

You're right - he does win. He's an open minded person who doesn't act like he knows how everyone else should go about living their lives. He's full of win.

[Trevytrev11]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

Out of curiosity, to those have input on this topic, how many of you are actually parents? I just think anyone that is not may well be unqualified for this discussion as your whole life and outlook on life goes through changes when you become a parent. I know there are things I said I would never do or change before hand that have since gone out the window.

I just think those who are not parents will be suprised at how much they themselves change and how much softer you become when you have kids. And obviously this isn't the case for everyone, but from my experience with myself and with others it's more of the norm.

It's funny playing softball or basketball with a bunch of grown men, who yell, scream, grunt and cuss for an hour of athletic competition and then turn into softies after the game when their kids come up and give them a high 5 or a hug.

[Stumbleweed]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

FWIW, I'm not a parent... I was talking in general about a future kid(s) I would have.

[DC]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

So I guess it comes down to whether one believes a kiss on the lips is always of a sexual connotation.

As I said before. A kiss on the lips is for a man and a woman. Not for relatives, family, sons, daughters. The only person I will kiss on the lips is a heterosexual female. Now EVERY kiss on the lips isn't sexual. Correct, I agreed with that before.

I just don't believe lip kissing is something a parent should give a child. Espcially a father.

Mothers are usually the ones with that lobby dubby mushy stuff. A father kissing a kid on the lips doesn't have the same affect. I am not cool with EITHER parent doing it, but women get more of a pass than a man would get.

[Scottdau]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

Being a parent is hard. You have to just do your best. There are good books out there to read and help, but it is not easy to be respondsible for a little life. I love being a dad and will kiss my kids for as long as they let me.

[Trevytrev11]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

FWIW, I'm not a parent... I was talking in general about a future kid(s) I would have.

And obviously with your outlook you're not going to change your views. I just think those on the other side may end up being suprised at how much they do change the first time they hold their child.

[Stumbleweed]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

Mothers are usually the ones with that lobby dubby mushy stuff.

Loving their children and showing it publicly?

It's all good, to each his own. Just amazed how hard people buy into the typical gender roles which history has shown are almost completely malleable and solely dependent upon the society and era in which the role exists. Treating them as gospel or some kind of set in stone rules is funny to me.

[DC]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

It is just weird to me when a father is overly affectionate to his kids. Not saying he is not supposed to be affectionate. But OVERLY affectionate. Touchy, huggy, kissy, etc. It is just different and as I said things moreso associated with motherhood.

Before anyone misquotes me, fathers should show their kids affection. But it shouldn't be to the extent that a typically mother shows.

So TrevyTrev, don't come in here saying that I said fathers are supposed to make their kids sour and hard and touch and cold.

[DC]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

@ Stumble, I only believe in gender roles in certain situations.

We can save that for another day.

[Trevytrev11]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

So TrevyTrev, don't come in here saying that I said fathers are supposed to make their kids sour and hard and touch and cold.

Nah, it's cool. I understand, I just have a different view point. Every family has personality roles and in every family those personality roles are defined differently. I assume in your family the roles of men and women are very black and white with very little overlapping grey area. Mine are probably opposite with very little black and white and much more gray area. Maybe I'm on that.

A lot of it comes down to how we were brought up and raised by our own parent(s). So much of our beliefs and personalities come from how we were nurtred that it can't be expected for many to go outside of that, whether it's for the better or for the worse.

I assume that most fathers who show affection to their children via hugs and kisses do so because they believe the child benefits from it and I assume that those who find other ways to show affection do so becuase they also believe the child benefits from it. There is obviously more ways than one to raise a successful child. The bottom line is regardless of how you show it, a kid needs to know that they are loved.

I guess all you can hope for is that people respect others wishes on how they want to parent and accept their decisions as their decisions and not judge them on it.

[Stumbleweed]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

The only problem for me is that kids raised by parents who say it's wrong or whatever go to school and start making fun of the kids who get kissed by their parents... and then it becomes a problem for the other kid when it wasn't an issue before. Especially when the connotation is that it's gay or strange, it can become problematic when you raise your kids that way because they'll go start preaching to the other kids. I've never seen it go the other way around where the kid getting kissed makes fun of the other one... just thought that was worth mentioning.

The best thing IMO would be "we don't do that, but some other families do, and that's fine"... hopefully it's not a case of "we don't do that because it's wrong and/or gives people the wrong idea", because that's just creating some judgemental-***, closed-minded kids for no real reason and possibly making the other kids insecure about themselves/their families for something that many families do and is perfectly fine.

[Scottdau]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

DC. Your whole belief is opinion, father can kiss their kids. That post sound like you said it was fact that dad should not act like the mom with their kids. You should put in your opinion and if you did that I appologrize I am own a cell phone, so I might have read it wrong. At the end of the day it is all opinion.

[MC Fatigue]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

As I said before. A kiss on the lips is for a man and a woman. Not for relatives, family, sons, daughters. The only person I will kiss on the lips is a heterosexual female. Now EVERY kiss on the lips isn't sexual. Correct, I agreed with that before.

I just don't believe lip kissing is something a parent should give a child. Espcially a father.

Mothers are usually the ones with that lobby dubby mushy stuff. A father kissing a kid on the lips doesn't have the same affect. I am not cool with EITHER parent doing it, but women get more of a pass than a man would get.

I don't think I've ever wanted to plant a kiss on another man as badly as I do you right now...

MMmmmmmmUAH!

[Stumbleweed]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

I don't think I've ever wanted to plant a kiss on another man as badly as I do you right now...

MMmmmmmmUAH!

[Heelfan71]

Re: 2 part question for those with kids.

Pretty easy for someone who doesn't have kids to say they wouldn't kiss their kids on the lips. My 5 year old son gives me kisses on the lips all the time and I think it's awesome. The love you have for your kids is amazing. I'm sure when he gets older I will kiss him on the forehead or cheek and hug him.

Anyone who thinks kissing your child is weak or makes them less manly needs a reality check. Kids need love. the more the better.