So I have this girl problem

[Yeah...THAT Guy]

Re: So I have this girl problem

Well I'm not the kind of guy that will just nail random girls just because they are there, sorry.

As for trying to ask her one last time, like I mentioned earlier, I never see her anymore and I have no clue when I'll see her next. And on top of that, I'm not sure I'll ever get the chance to talk to her alone and all that.

Thanks for the advice though guys.. Keep it coming :wink:

If it makes you feel any better, I'm not into the whole "just bone someone else" thing either. Just not my style.

Personally, I'd try to get in touch with her. It never hurts in the long run to tell a girl you like them. And it would definitely give it more closure if you at least try.

[legendkiller5]

Re: So I have this girl problem

Well I'm not the kind of guy that will just nail random girls just because they are there, sorry.

As for trying to ask her one last time, like I mentioned earlier, I never see her anymore and I have no clue when I'll see her next. And on top of that, I'm not sure I'll ever get the chance to talk to her alone and all that.

Thanks for the advice though guys.. Keep it coming :wink:

Man, whatever you decide to do, do it fast. Chances are if she's already on campus, she's already been 'introduced' to some of the athletes. They waste no time, so I suggest you decide what to do now.

[Suntan Superman]

Re: So I have this girl problem

I have a girl problem too, it's called a wife, I'll trade you?

haha, jk

No really honey, in the unlikely event you read this, I love you and you're not a problem.



ANYWAY, best advice is to find someone new. Back in high school i was always hung up on this chick, but she never made time for me, and things were always kind of awkward in the whole, i definitely dig this chick more than she digs me sense. Eventually she started seeing someone else, it took a little while, but there's so many fish in that sea(YES GOT MY CLICHE IN), it's not worth pining over someone who don't feel the same.

Plus, the truth is, in the end, it's so worth it. If you actually find someone who digs you as much as you dig them, there ain't an adequate description in this world to describe it. Call it magic, call it whatever, but it's so worth all the pain and agony of everything else you go through.

Also yeah, on the whole just bone other chicks thing, don't worry about it man. You gotta style, you stick with it. Don't ever get off your own game, or you'll end up with someone you won't have a real connection with.

And my last piece of advice. CH2k8 before hoes, bro.

[VandyRedskins21]

Re: So I have this girl problem

Do you have her phone number? Facebook? You don't have to ask her out in person.

Facebook.. It just seems kinda off/desperate if I sent her a random message wanting to hang out after not even talking to her for a few months don't you think?

And my last piece of advice. CH2k8 before hoes, bro.

This maybe the best piece of advice I've ever gotten, no lie!! lol

[Champion8877]

Re: So I have this girl problem

Facebook.. It just seems kinda off/desperate if I sent her a random message wanting to hang out after not even talking to her for a few months don't you think?

Well it's pretty much your only option left if you want to give it one last shot. Send her a message and ask for her number, say it's been a while and you wanna talk to her or something, if she doesn't give it to you then go ahead and move on and forget her.

[HarkTheSound]

Re: So I have this girl problem

Hey Vandy, thought I'd throw my input out there.

I was your age around the time I started this thread: http://www.operationsports.com/forum...-guidance.html

I know the stories aren't similar, but the lesson I learned from it will most likely be the same for you. Once you get to college, it's a whole new ballgame. I promise. I met my present girlfriend around the same time I was fretting about the past relationship I was talking about in that thread, and eventually, our friendship turned relationship has helped me push all that stuff from the past behind me.

I'm not the person to go out, party, get laid and all that either. Wanna know how I met my gf? Working the same shift at the Daily Tar Heel. Just wait till you go to school (in August I'm assuming?). You'll find what you're looking for.

[bichettehappens]

Well it's pretty much your only option left if you want to give it one last shot. Send her a message and ask for her number, say it's been a while and you wanna talk to her or something, if she doesn't give it to you then go ahead and move on and forget her.

Yep, this. I don't think it'll come off as desperate. If you're worried about that then maybe start off with a simple hey how are things it's been a while message, and then after she replies, if she seems happy to hear from you, ask if she wants to hang out and catch up.

I recently casually caught up with 2 exes via Facebook. I know it's not the same scenario but like Champion said, it's all you got. Go for it.

Even if by some chance it does come across as desperate, it's better to have given it a shot then to be left in the same place wondering.

[IlliniM1ke]

Re: So I have this girl problem

Facebook.. It just seems kinda off/desperate if I sent her a random message wanting to hang out after not even talking to her for a few months don't you think?

Yeah its going to look desperate to her and probably weird that you waited 8 months, not to mention shes probably pretty busy now with college and playing basketball so the timing is probably not the best right now.

Well it's pretty much your only option left if you want to give it one last shot. Send her a message and ask for her number, say it's been a while and you wanna talk to her or something, if she doesn't give it to you then go ahead and move on and forget her.

This, if you truly have to know and you don't have her number the facebook message is about your only option. If you have her number send her a text or something or even give her a call.

I would just let it go though, if you happen to run into her again maybe take your chance then but after 8 months I agree with the person who said chalk this one up to experience, you now know what not to do next time you're in this situation.

[AUChase]

Re: So I have this girl problem

I hate to piggyback off of a thread, but there's no need in having 50 threads about women problems.

I've been on three dates with this girl and we get along great. We're sort of a "thing" but neither of us really are ready to give it a name. We talk daily and see each other once every few days and it's become more and more frequent. She's got a few "guy friends" and she refers to them as BFFs, even out in public like on Facebook. So it's not like she's just referring to them as BFFs to me. They don't hang out on the regular and usually just tag along when she goes out with her group of friends.

On the flip side, when I'm with my big group, there are some girls in the group that I consider good friends. I know my intentions are good and I trust that hers are too, but I've never been crazy about the "guy friends" crap. I know some guys put it down and say "Hell no", but I've had girlfriends who are way too damn jealous and I don't want to be the same way towards her, because she's been honest with me from the get go..

I may just be over thinking it, because I really do trust her about it. They even call each other bro and sis.. I've seen it on FaceBook. So, to get down to "brass tax" here.. do you guys think I'm doing the right thing by trusting her on it ? I know you don't know her personally and it's hard for you to get a great idea.. just looking for a bit of insight.

Edit: It's also worth mentioning that I've met them. She invited me to come with her over to the Lakeview District in Birmingham to hang out with her friends and they were there. She was really touchy feely with me in front of them and it didn't seem weird for any of them..

I've never been burnt on this sort of thing before, so I think I'm doing the right thing.

[IlliniM1ke]

Re: So I have this girl problem

Hard to say, I understand your concerns because typically a guy isn't just friends with a chick just because, they usually would like something more than that (not a relationship but keeping it with the TOS), girls seem to be oblivious to that for whatever reason and she probably isn't interested in them that way but I'd be willing to bet if she were to conduct a poll and ask them to give her an honest answer they would probably say they would sleep with her.

Actually had a friend of mine do that with his girlfriend, she swore none of her guy friends would want to hook up with her so he made a bet with her that at least half of them would, so she asked them all that hypothetically if she wanted to have some fun no strings attached would they say yes or no and the results were pretty much unanimously that yes they would.

That said it all ultimately comes down to trust, if you believe that she isn't interested in them that way then I'd say its fine, but if you're always going to be wondering anytime shes out with them and you aren't then it probably won't. If she considers them good friends odds are it won't go over well if you give her the "Hell No" ultimatum.

From the sounds of it you trust her so I'd say you're doing the right thing.

[Feared]

Re: So I have this girl problem

Heck all the girls that I'm friends with have been friends and nothing more, but I am the master at getting friend-zoned.

So it might not be worth worrying about, however if you do become an "Official" couple, then I would expect her time with her BFFs would cut down to spend more time with you... naturally.

[Cusefan]

Re: So I have this girl problem

Heck all the girls that I'm friends with have been friends and nothing more, but I am the master at getting friend-zoned.

So it might not be worth worrying about, however if you do become an "Official" couple, then I would expect her time with her BFFs would cut down to spend more time with you... naturally.

So true, getting into the friend zone is as simple as not striking while the iron is hot. I recently got into the friend zone but I'm not too upset about it as I have a "friend" who will show up whenever I call. I'm also going on a date tomorrow with a girl I met online, when I meet girls online I feel much more confident since I know they are interested.

[jmood88]

Re: So I have this girl problem

I hate to piggyback off of a thread, but there's no need in having 50 threads about women problems.

I've been on three dates with this girl and we get along great. We're sort of a "thing" but neither of us really are ready to give it a name. We talk daily and see each other once every few days and it's become more and more frequent. She's got a few "guy friends" and she refers to them as BFFs, even out in public like on Facebook. So it's not like she's just referring to them as BFFs to me. They don't hang out on the regular and usually just tag along when she goes out with her group of friends.

On the flip side, when I'm with my big group, there are some girls in the group that I consider good friends. I know my intentions are good and I trust that hers are too, but I've never been crazy about the "guy friends" crap. I know some guys put it down and say "Hell no", but I've had girlfriends who are way too damn jealous and I don't want to be the same way towards her, because she's been honest with me from the get go..

I may just be over thinking it, because I really do trust her about it. They even call each other bro and sis.. I've seen it on FaceBook. So, to get down to "brass tax" here.. do you guys think I'm doing the right thing by trusting her on it ? I know you don't know her personally and it's hard for you to get a great idea.. just looking for a bit of insight.

Edit: It's also worth mentioning that I've met them. She invited me to come with her over to the Lakeview District in Birmingham to hang out with her friends and they were there. She was really touchy feely with me in front of them and it didn't seem weird for any of them..

I've never been burnt on this sort of thing before, so I think I'm doing the right thing.

There's no reason to not trust her. You're not even a couple yet so if you think you can tell her to not hang out with them, that's not going to happen, and if you're going to give up on a potential relationship just because the girl is friends with some guys, then you're going to be single for awhile. I'll probably be in the minority on here with this since a lot of guys seemingly can't control themselves around girls but some of my best friends are girls and my girlfriend has no problem with it and I don't give a damn that she has some male friends. My whole philosophy is that if you can't trust them, then you probably shouldn't be with them. That doesn't mean that you let yourself get played but until you have a real reason to think that something is going on with a male friend, just don't worry about.

[VandyRedskins21]

Re: So I have this girl problem

I would just let it go though, if you happen to run into her again maybe take your chance then but after 8 months I agree with the person who said chalk this one up to experience, you now know what not to do next time you're in this situation.

This is basically what I've been thinking. I don't think it would be the best idea to do the whole facebook thing but that's just me. However, if I do see her sometime soon, I'll try and see if I can make something happen.

I've found that just coming on here and getting the situation out has helped. Thanks everyone for the comments and advice.. I'll update if anything happens :wink:

[Yeah...THAT Guy]

Re: So I have this girl problem

Hey Vandy, thought I'd throw my input out there.

I was your age around the time I started this thread: http://www.operationsports.com/forum...-guidance.html

I know the stories aren't similar, but the lesson I learned from it will most likely be the same for you. Once you get to college, it's a whole new ballgame. I promise. I met my present girlfriend around the same time I was fretting about the past relationship I was talking about in that thread, and eventually, our friendship turned relationship has helped me push all that stuff from the past behind me.

I'm not the person to go out, party, get laid and all that either. Wanna know how I met my gf? Working the same shift at the Daily Tar Heel. Just wait till you go to school (in August I'm assuming?). You'll find what you're looking for.

Wanna know how I met mine? I was rushing for an honors co-ed fraternity and my pledge class had to do a fundraiser, so we auctioned ourselves off and my girlfriend bought me to make her french toast.