Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

[jgarcia]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I worked at a pharmacy in HS and on about ten occasions stole pills. Not much at a time, but enough to have a few fun nights.

Spoiler

Adderall mostly, but also Ritalin, Morphine, and Marinol.

Damn dude, me too. I didnt expect to read this.
Lol

[ImTellinTim]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I have Meniere's Disease, but it rarely hinders my enjoyment of life.

Is that a genetic thing or brought on by your exposure to loud sounds related to playing music?

[PVarck31]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I don't really feel the full range. It's hard to connect with people on an emotional level.

From my fingers to your eyes...

Did they rule out sociopathy?

[shugknight]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I had a female best friend from High School. I had a huge crush on her, but she was very prude and never had a boyfriend so I could never approach her in that way. After many years of trying, and our friends joking around about us getting married one day, I hooked up with her cousin.

It was just one of those odd nights where we were all hanging out and then all of a sudden I find myself and her cousin having too many Patron shots. Then going for a walk outside.. then making out.

Feeling guilty, I couldn't go on in case my friend finds out and it ruins our friendship.

5 weeks later, she texts me late at night and ends up coming over. After a few more shots of Patron and almost being attacked by a raccoon (we were drinking outside) she's on my lap. Then my bedroom. And this went on for almost a year.

Till this day (6 years later), only my friend's cousin and I know about it.

[daflyboys]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Did they rule out sociopathy?

I don't think it's the consideration since he mentioned the notion of guilt in his OP and those displaying sociopathy would not entertain that notion.... since by and large they are active criminals at some level. All in all that's a personality development (which, of course, does seem to beget some level of genetics), not a "condition".

I suspected and somewhat confirmed that alexythymia is more on the autism scale, which makes more sense, and would be more in line with a condition, syndrome or complex.

[oneamongthefence]

I don't think it's the consideration since he mentioned the notion of guilt in his OP and those displaying sociopathy would not entertain that notion.... since by and large they are active criminals at some level. All in all that's a personality development (which, of course, does seem to beget some level of genetics), not a "condition".

I suspected and somewhat confirmed that alexythymia is more on the autism scale, which makes more sense, and would be more in line with a condition, syndrome or complex.

There is some stuff I should feel guilty for but I don't. And I rarely feel sorry for what I do.

But yes it does fall into the autism scale. I don't take medication even though my dad wanted me to take an herbal remedy for acting like a robot and lacking emotion. I have to fake a lot of stuff especially around holidays.

IM definitely not a criminal though.

From my fingers to your eyes...

[PVarck31]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I don't think it's the consideration since he mentioned the notion of guilt in his OP and those displaying sociopathy would not entertain that notion.... since by and large they are active criminals at some level. All in all that's a personality development (which, of course, does seem to beget some level of genetics), not a "condition".

I suspected and somewhat confirmed that alexythymia is more on the autism scale, which makes more sense, and would be more in line with a condition, syndrome or complex.

I gotcha. I missed that part.

[PVarck31]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

There is some stuff I should feel guilty for but I don't. And I rarely feel sorry for what I do.

But yes it does fall into the autism scale. I don't take medication even though my dad wanted me to take an herbal remedy for acting like a robot and lacking emotion. I have to fake a lot of stuff especially around holidays.

IM definitely not a criminal though.

From my fingers to your eyes...

If I'm prying then by all means tell me to stop, but I was wondering if you have seen a psychologist or psychiatrist?

[oneamongthefence]

Yep. On base though. They also said I might have a slight case of ptsd from living at home.

From my fingers to your eyes...

[daflyboys]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Not to derail, but you sound like an INTJ personality type.

Not everyone knows what Myers-Briggs involves. You should elaborate, but I think we're diverting from the jist of this thread.

[Bmore Irish]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I'm terrified about the possibility that I may be an alcoholic. I always joke about it, like I did earlier in this thread and with my friends all the time, but inside it really worries me. I've had a couple people I love suggest that I have a problem. I don't really think I do, and I have absolutely no desire to stop drinking, but I feel terrible about how many times I've hurt people I love when I'm inebriated. I lack self control and can't say no, especially to myself. I have a terrible temper, and if anything this is what worries me the most. I don't want it to end in a tragedy. Maybe my depression had a hand in the way I drink now, because when I was depressed it was the lowest, darkest point of my life, and I don't ever want to end up back in that place again. A lot of times, I drink to forget.

[XtremeDunkz]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I'm terrified about the possibility that I may be an alcoholic. I always joke about it, like I did earlier in this thread and with my friends all the time, but inside it really worries me. I've had a couple people I love suggest that I have a problem. I don't really think I do, and I have absolutely no desire to stop drinking, but I feel terrible about how many times I've hurt people I love when I'm inebriated. I lack self control and can't say no, especially to myself. I have a terrible temper, and if anything this is what worries me the most. I don't want it to end in a tragedy. Maybe my depression had a hand in the way I drink now, because when I was depressed it was the lowest, darkest point of my life, and I don't ever want to end up back in that place again. A lot of times, I drink to forget.

I hope you can take control, good luck. This is why I have never touched alcohol in my life. When I was about 7 years old i was at my Aunt and Uncles house. Uncle had been out drinking, came home, and wanted to go back out but my aunt hid his keys telling him he was too drunk to drive. He went crazy and started throwing things around the house. My aunt locked me in the bathroom until the cops came. It was crazy. I think that made me never want to touch it. Plus it just keeps getting reinforced when I am out and see people cheating on their significant other, and using alcohol as some kind of excuse, so lame. I have never felt like I have been missing out on anything. When I am with drunk people I feel like I am babysitting....

End of rant

[shugknight]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Havent' done it in a while..

But when I'm feeling lonely. I normally text one of my exes up and they help me in every way.

[gerg1234]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I'm terrified about the possibility that I may be an alcoholic. I always joke about it, like I did earlier in this thread and with my friends all the time, but inside it really worries me. I've had a couple people I love suggest that I have a problem. I don't really think I do, and I have absolutely no desire to stop drinking, but I feel terrible about how many times I've hurt people I love when I'm inebriated. I lack self control and can't say no, especially to myself. I have a terrible temper, and if anything this is what worries me the most. I don't want it to end in a tragedy. Maybe my depression had a hand in the way I drink now, because when I was depressed it was the lowest, darkest point of my life, and I don't ever want to end up back in that place again. A lot of times, I drink to forget.

Somebody really close to me is an alcoholic. She likes to think she's normal but she can't handle it.
For example, she'll quit for months & think "OK, I can do this again." It starts alright, but 3 weeks later she'll go to the bathroom for 20 minutes and come out drunk.
She's a great person to be around when she is in her sober phase, but when the bad part of her brain takes over she'll sacrifice anything for a drink.
It's crazy to me that a substance can have the hold on a person, but it's obvious that it does.

[shugknight]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Also as a network admin at my old job, I had access to the entire company's folders/files.

So I normally did a search for .jpg and look at all our hot female workers vacation pics.

There were some NSFW ones too.