Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

[wwharton]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I'm not going to pretend I have read every post in the entire thread...But it started with dude admitting he worked out to Huey Lewis and the News...then it had jokes about Burger King bathrooms, shooting a man in Reno, a run of thoughts on the self sexytime urges created by American Gladiators and dozens of other humorous forays.

I'm pretty sure none of those people were trying to make other "heavy" people feel like their experiences were taken lightly. And neither was I, so If I offended anybody...my bad.

But seriously...I don't recall seeing a moderator step in and say the original tone of the thread was light and warn off anybody from bring the mood down.

Just saying.

No need to get defensive. I'm pretty sure I said as much in my post. I'm not warning anyone, just sharing how I feel. I cringed at all the other examples you presented as well... just felt like speaking on it now. As you can see, many people seem to agree with me.

In terms of OS rules you didn't do anything wrong. But at this point, anyone reading this thread is going to fly by a post like yours like it doesn't even exist so why even bother? Lots of substance here. That's all I'm saying. If you don't want to jump in, just read. If it's too heavy, just skip it. Hell, if you want to keep posting one liners that's up to you too, but my guess is most of the people coming back to this thread aren't feeling them.

[jeremym480]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I've been wanting to share a few stories here, but haven't had the time. Here's one and I'm going to try to keep it PG-13, but if it's not mods feel free to delete.

When I was 18, during my first semester of college I went to a party on a Saturday night. I was drinking pretty heavy and doing a few other things as well. I ended up hooking up with this girl. I remember going to the bedroom and making out with her and the next thing I know I wake up the next morning without any clothes on and "Little jeremym480" in a lot of pain.

When I went to the bathroom, I notice that I don't look like myself (down there). You see I was uncircumcised and my thing basically was flipped inside out or something. I can't really even explain it. I guess the closest thing I can say is that it looked like a two-headed monster.

I'm basically stuck at house where the party was at and at mercy of someone to drive me home. When I finally get home to my parents house Sunday afternoon I was just hoping it would go away, but it didn't. After a night full of pain, I finally submitted and told my mom that I needed to go to the doctor.

She brought me to the only doctor in town that Monday morning. Basically, the same doctor I had seen all my life. When I told him my problem. He told me to drop trou and came close to observe. When I did and he saw it, he just backed away and said "Oh My Goodness, I'm going to have to send you to a specialist".

So we go to a specialist and of course I have to share my story with his hot nurses and they look at it and I'm all embarrassed and everything. Eventually the doctor finally comes in and pokes around on it for a while and get it to go back to normal. Then he starts talking to me about having a circumcision and the nurse is there too. She's like "oh, you should go ahead and do it. Your future wife will like it so much better" Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that my mom is standing there the whole time.

Anyway, to make a long story short... I got circumcised and possibly raped when I was 18.

So make sure to get you son's circumcised when their babies, so they don't have to go through what I did when I was 18....

[Yeah...THAT Guy]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I'm not sure if I've ever posted about this here before, but when I was in middle school (about 10 years ago now), I had been feeling sick, so my mom let me sleep in and when I woke up, I felt alright enough to go to school, so my mom agreed to drive me to school late.

This was in like late January-early February in Rochester, NY, so there was still a lot of snow on the ground. Anyways, I was sitting directly behind my mom in the car (at that point, I still didn't really sit in the passenger seat of cars because of how small I was). I remember they were talking about the upcoming season of Survivor on the radio and I was just hunched over in the car with my head leaning up against the back of her seat.

We were stopped at an intersection literally like a minute from my school, and there was a van that didn't realize it was a red light so they tried to stop at the last second. Because of all the snow on the ground, they weren't able to stop and they swerved around the car that was in front of them and ended up hitting us head on.

Since I had my head down and didn't see the van coming, I didn't tense up, so I ended up just having a slight headache (and some back issues to this day, but nothing too serious). However, my mom tensed up and ended up tearing her rotator cuff and a couple of her discs in her back among other things.

I remember when the doctors asked her where all the pain was and she pointed directly at the spot that would have been lined up with where I had been resting my head against the back of her seat. It's been 10 years, she's had back surgery like 3 or 4 times, including one fusion, and she probably needs another soon. She went from the being the woman that taught me everything I know in sports to now not even being able to sit through a movie because it hurts her back too much.

I still feel like it was the force of my head against the seat of her car combined with the force of the van and her tensing up that did that to her.

[Moses Shuttlesworth]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

This is the best thread in my history of OS. Please mods, do your job but don't overdo it.

Thanks,
Moses <3

[C the Lyte]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I'm not sure if I've ever posted about this here before, but when I was in middle school (about 10 years ago now), I had been feeling sick, so my mom let me sleep in and when I woke up, I felt alright enough to go to school, so my mom agreed to drive me to school late.

This was in like late January-early February in Rochester, NY, so there was still a lot of snow on the ground. Anyways, I was sitting directly behind my mom in the car (at that point, I still didn't really sit in the passenger seat of cars because of how small I was). I remember they were talking about the upcoming season of Survivor on the radio and I was just hunched over in the car with my head leaning up against the back of her seat.

We were stopped at an intersection literally like a minute from my school, and there was a van that didn't realize it was a red light so they tried to stop at the last second. Because of all the snow on the ground, they weren't able to stop and they swerved around the car that was in front of them and ended up hitting us head on.

Since I had my head down and didn't see the van coming, I didn't tense up, so I ended up just having a slight headache (and some back issues to this day, but nothing too serious). However, my mom tensed up and ended up tearing her rotator cuff and a couple of her discs in her back among other things.

I remember when the doctors asked her where all the pain was and she pointed directly at the spot that would have been lined up with where I had been resting my head against the back of her seat. It's been 10 years, she's had back surgery like 3 or 4 times, including one fusion, and she probably needs another soon. She went from the being the woman that taught me everything I know in sports to now not even being able to sit through a movie because it hurts her back too much.

I still feel like it was the force of my head against the seat of her car combined with the force of the van and her tensing up that did that to her.

That's not your fault at all.

This is the best thread in my history of OS. Please mods, do your job but don't overdo it.

Thanks,
Moses <3

I think they've been pretty lenient... to say the least. I second the appreciation for this also.

Well, one of mine...

I hate... HATE visiting 2 of my 3 grandmothers. My grandfathers, all 3 which have passed, were kick *** guys to be around. But these 2 women bring me down man. There is nothing ever positive that comes out of their mouths. One always talks about she can't wait to die. Now, she's been through some tough things. But how the **** do I have a conversation with that? I don't need that **** in my life. There's enough negativity to be found.

The other is selfish. Has loads of cash, and refuses set up a will. This doesn't piss me off as I have done fine with what my wife and I have. I don't need someone's money, property, or anything else. The problem is she has 7 children, and I've seen what no will can do to a family when there are inheritance involved. I love her as my blood, as my grandmother, but I resent her as a person.

Not too deep, and probably more of a gear grinder. Still, I guess what I am saying is I resent my grandmothers.

[z Revis]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I have a grandmother who I haven't talked to in probably 10 years. Reason: She's evil. My dad calls her satan lol. I'm not kidding. I can tell you countless stories from my childhood about her literally avoiding spending time with me because of her own selfish ways. Or how about the time my dad tried to set me up once a week to mow her grass.. ya know just to have more of a relationship with her. What was her response? It would be too much of a burden for her.

Funny thing is now that I'm grown she acts like she cares and wants to be around and talk to me etc. She sent me a birthday card last year saying how much she misses me and gave me her cell number. Sorry, but I can see right through that BS. For one I barely know you. For two if you truly wanted to see me you'd come to my house or call my dad nonstop asking if you can speak with me. Not send me a card out of the blue and put your number on it.

[AC]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

New one: I'm don't have enough self confidence in myself to present a video project to my class. I'm petrified that I look and sound like a complete idiot.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

My Grandma just made traditional Armenian Easter cookies for the entire family.

She's bad ***.

[baumy300]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

My Grandma just made traditional Armenian Easter cookies for the entire family.

She's bad ***.

Those sound incredibly scrumptious right now.

Can you post a picture of an Armenian Easter cookie or do you wan't to wrestle?

[ubernoob]

I don't know if it's a deep, dark secret...

I pretty much hate people. I'm not saying this facetiously or anything. I don't enjoy going out in public at all. I have, because my fiancée enjoys doing things, but it's rare. I always end up feeling a little guilty because I don't end up having much fun and I just feel like I bring her enjoyment of things down.

It can be something as simple as her wanting me to go to the mall with her, and I absolutely refuse to. I can tolerate her friends at times, but I get super uncomfortable around them and also around her family (also my own family for the most part, even more so since I've moved away from them.)

I don't wish ill on any of them and want them to all be happy... I just wish I didn't have to go to any stupid events that people hold for them to be happy. They should focus on enjoying whatever they're doing without giving a second thought to where I am or how I'm doing.

I talk to people on OS (or people from OS on Twitter) more than I talk to any of my " friends" from real life, and I prefer it that way, honestly. I don't feel a twinge of sadness for those commercials that tell you to support third world children (not to say I don't think their situation blows) but those damn Sarah McLaughlin commercials with the dogs breaks my heart every time I see it.

The only time I've seen a psych was for them to diagnose my insomnia when I was exiting the military for medical reasons, but I'm sure if I went to one they'd tell me I'm antisocial with some sociopathic tendencies.

I'm often very glib, and people I meet have an easy time taking to me and trusting me because I can see people for what they are for the most part and I play to their tendencies. I don't like sharing myself, but I'm an excellent listener so I pick up on things and tell people what they want to here. I have a feeling that of my parents didn't raise me in the manner they did I would have no problem taking advantage of people and not feeling bad about it. Most of my emotions feel shallow and almost forced for the sake of other people so they don't question my normalcy.

All I truly want in life is to be left to my own devices without being forced into things that hold no interest to me. This is why I failed at college the couple years I went. Every class I took on psychology and sociology I aced, but I ended up flunking out of two separate schools because the other classes I had to take held no interest to me so I just didn't go.

It's funny, but everyone always sees me as normal. I tell my fiancée or people out here that I really don't like people and just want to be left alone and they laugh and patronize me by saying "I know you don't, I don't either!" when in reality they can't go a week of being alone. I just shrug it off, though I wish they could see I was telling the truth.

And now that long rant is over.

[Champion8877]

I'm the same way, I just genuinely dislike people who I don't already know and do not care to get to know them.

I have a group of 4 really close friends and a few girls I'm fairly close with. But outside of them I have no interest in anybody.

I absolutely hate small talking with people at a store or restraunt or dentist or whatever. I can't count the number of waiters or waitresses who have cut their tip in half because they just would not shut up and it made me mad.

I wish I enjoyed people more and had a better more comfortable time meeting people, but I don't

[cardsfan2222]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I have a really hard time dealing with people. I don't have friends, partly because I'm extremely quiet, partly because my "friends" in middle school and high school treated me horribly so it's hard for me to trust people. I'm short-tempered with my wife and kids way too often, and I don't feel like I can control that. I'm not a patient person, and I let way too many little things bother me.
I shut my office door every day to limit my interactions with co-workers. It's not that they're unlikeable, but I'm not good with small talk and always feel awkward trying to have conversations.
I judge myself constantly for what I say and how I act. Even on here, I've deleted tons of posts because I convince myself no one cares about my opinion, or that they'll think I'm an idiot. Even after 20 minutes of working on this post, I don't know if I'll actually hit submit. If I try to make a joke on a post, I feel stupid if no one clicks like. I know that's stupid, but I can't help it. I always feel like I'm being judged. I don't think I've ever felt like I really belonged anywhere. I always feel like an outsider.
I used to think I'd be happy when I went to college, then when I got married, then when I had kids...I've done all of those things now and nothing has changed. Life is just really a struggle for me, and I hope more than anything that my kids never have to deal with these feelings.

[ubernoob]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Don't worry cards, we make fun of everybody equally here. You fit right in with all of us outcasts.

I have the opposite problem with posts more often than not. I'll hit submit, and then realize that I come off like an idiot so I have to flesh out my posts right after I post it.

[ScoobySnax]

Cards, you just describe me to a tee. There's not a single detail you shared that I can't relate to.

[jeremym480]

I wish that I could shut my door at work. You lucky s.o.b.

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