GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

[Altimus]

So my GF is going to EDC (techno rave concert)for the long weekend with her girlfriends... I'm obviously not going. When she told me I was iffy but was fine with it. Said it was some concert thing. We love each other and I trust her but she does have a habit to drink more than she should at social gatherings. Today my friend who has been there told me what really goes on there and now I feel a little worried. Maybe not worried, just awkward about the whole situation.

Would you be ok with your GF/wife going to a thing like this for a few days without you?

[Chrisksaint]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

Not a chance in hell, maybe they are different when it's not basically 100% college students.

It's definitely an awkward situation though like you said but it seems that you obviously trust her.

[XtremeDunkz]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

honestly? hellllllllllllllllllllllllllllll no. Those situations never end well. Especially since most of time the girls "friends" push them to do certain things even if they originally aren't thinking about it. Very slippery slope. I used to work at a bar, I saw it way too often. I wouldn't even allow that for a single night, let alone a weekend..

[ubernoob]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

EDC?

Oh, you poor soul.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

Someone I know that's getting married this summer kicked around the idea of holding his bachelor party in Vegas and going to EDC with his fiancee and her bachelorettes.

What the hell kinda idea is that?

[clipperfan811]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

F That ISH, I'd say that if she's still in a place in her life where she feels like she needs to cut loose like that with the girls, then she's not in a place in her life to be in a serious relationship.

And I'm not saying that a girlfriend/wife can't ever go away for a few days but events like that are not just innocent fun. They are what they are and everyone needs to be straight about that.

Relationships are tough to manage, no doubt about it and although trust is essential, so is respect.

I remember when I was about 20 I had a girlfriend who was 18, just out of high school (Absolutely the worst age to seriously date a girl btw). Anyways she had a little group of friends who where always trying to get her to go out clubbing and I wouldn't say a thing, (trying to play the secure boyfriend role). All it took though was 1 time of me letting her know that I was going to go out clubbing with the guys for her throw a fit about how we shouldn't be going to clubs without each other.

Now I'm not saying you should be planning a Vegas Trip with the guys on that same weekend (or am I) but sometimes all it takes is a quick role reversal to make someone come to their senses.

The other thing though is that no matter if it's your girlfriend, wife, child, little brother etc. Everyone is entitled to make their own choices and usually tightening your grip on them will only make them squirm free that much faster. You have to be confident in you! And that means being confident enough to draw some lines in the sand. I'm not talking about BS ultimatums and empty threats, I mean an honest understanding of what type of person you want to commit to.

Obviously I don't know enough details about your relationship to be giving you ultra specific advice. I'd hate to contribute to putting you off to what might be a very solid relationship.

Can't wait for an update!

[LingeringRegime]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

Nah, I wouldn't at all. You are justified in your thinking, no matter how she tries to twist it. Trust your gut.

[Watson]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

This is why I like country girls/am in something with one. I don't have to worry about raves. But **** does go down. You are completely justified in feeling like this.

[oneamongthefence]

Look at it as an opportunity to learn how to trust her better.

Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk 2

[NDAlum]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

As I always say, trust is irrelevant.

I would let my girlfriend go. She's hot and would probably get bombarded every second by guys hitting on her as well. If she cheats then I move on.

[Beantown]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

Honestly, I think I would...at least with my girlfriend anyway. Worst she'd do would be make out with her girlfriends she went with even though she'd get molested by every guy around her at one of those.

**** goes down at EDC concerts, no doubt about it, but if you trust her and if she's with a group of just girls, things should be fine. She'll definitely be grinding on some dudes, though, whether intentionally or unintentionally.

Also, EDC is better than, say, Dayglow or "Life in Color" or whatever it's called now, for this situation. Lots more people, lots more focus on getting drugged out and listening to the music while doing some grinding. Dayglow/etc. are basically "Let's take drugs and **** on a dancefloor while there is music and lights."

[aholbert32]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

So my GF is going to EDC (techno rave concert)for the long weekend with her girlfriends... I'm obviously not going. When she told me I was iffy but was fine with it. Said it was some concert thing. We love each other and I trust her but she does have a habit to drink more than she should at social gatherings. Today my friend who has been there told me what really goes on there and now I feel a little worried. Maybe not worried, just awkward about the whole situation.

Would you be ok with your GF/wife going to a thing like this for a few days without you?

I would. This isnt a shot at you Altimus but I hate fake trust. Either you trust her or you dont. My fiance (soon to be wife) has gone on multiple trips with her girls and without me. I've gone on trips with my friends without her. As much as I know, nothing has happened and I believe nothing happened because I trust her. If you dont trust her enough to travel somewhere with her girls, drink and not do something physical with another guy......maybe you shouldnt be with her.

[aholbert32]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

Someone I know that's getting married this summer kicked around the idea of holding his bachelor party in Vegas and going to EDC with his fiancee and her bachelorettes.

What the hell kinda idea is that?

As someone who just had his Bachelor Party two months ago, thats the lamest idea ever.

[Altimus]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

Aaron, I do trust her but like this board, everyone is telling me no and what was I thinking. I'm partially to blame as I didn't do my homework on what this was till yesterday when my friend told me instead of when her friends bought her the tickets a month or so ago.

Either way now I feel my only, well not only my right option is to just wait this out. Was tempted to text something but feel it would make the situation even worse.

Appreciate the comments guys.

[SuperBowlNachos]

Re: GF going to EDC for weekend without me... question

Bringing it up may just piss her off and make her want to do something. The last thing you want is to go on a break before going to EDC...