Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

[ubernoob]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

I'm glad you know what I'm here for moreso than I do. Appreciated.

Any time someone has told you that you were in the wrong, you've brought up some excuse to hide behind. It's a hard situation that was handled extremely poorly. That's it. Nobody is saying you're a bad person or a bad father. Just that it was handled wrong.

[Cardot]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

If you're out and someone basically pushes past you to get somewhere, would you expect/demand/request them to apologize to you? Whether you verbalize it or not, would you in your mind, expect them to apologize?

Yes, my expectation would be that they would apologize. But I have never been big on forced apologies. If a sincere apology didn't come directly from them, that would tell me something about that person and their character, and that more likely than not, any sort of reasoning would be out the window. Of all the possible outcomes of a negotiation, I would think that the majority would not benefit me. Be it a sarcastic apology, an escalation or just a debate that wastes my time.

Someone who pushes through a child in a wheel chair is a major scumbag who likely has serious issues. I can totally understand wanting to knock him out, but it wouldn't be in my mindset to reason/negotiate with them or to really educate them. It doesn't sound like he had the required intelligence for an adult conversation.

[countryboy]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

Any time someone has told you that you were in the wrong, you've brought up some excuse to hide behind. It's a hard situation that was handled extremely poorly. That's it. Nobody is saying you're a bad person or a bad father. Just that it was handled wrong.

no excuses, just providing reasons for why I reacted and handled it the way I did.

I am ok with those saying that I handled it wrong, because my wife was one of them. Maybe I did, but I handled it as how I saw fit in that moment in time.

[jeremym480]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

And again, I don't think its a fair analogy. My reaction was based on my feel to "protect" my daughter. And if he asks her to move, or goes around, the situation doesn't escalate the way it did, right?

Probably not, but we can only control ourselves. I know it's probably a crappy way to look at the world, but honestly I have no expectation of other people. There's just so many crappy people in the world, some of whom if they accidentally bumped into you would just as soon spit on you as to say I'm sorry.

Honestly, my take is if the person was a decent human being they would have apologized without having to be told to; and if they didn't apologize right away it would have said to me that they're not interested in apologizing. You can't force someone in to doing something they don't want to do, things just go South quickly when that happens.

I know that you feel that you protected your daughter, but demanding an apology really just made things worse, in my opinion. Simply because the guy is a PoS and PoS's generally don't apologize because they aren't sorry for their actions.

With that said once he started speaking I don't blame you for what you did. Although, as pointed out before that could have ended up terribly for everyone involved. Imagine how you daughter would have felt had you gotten KO'ed.... or if you went to jail. It's terrible what he said, but in the end letting him just go about his day, with you guys feeling slighted would have been better than what this escalated in to. Like the old saying goes "if you wrestle with a pig, you both get dirty and the pig likes it". You stooped to this guys level and even if he did get a few bumps and bruises he probably loved that he got to you in the end.

no excuses, just providing reasons for why I reacted and handled it the way I did.

I am ok with those saying that I handled it wrong, because my wife was one of them. Maybe I did, but I handled it as how I saw fit in that moment in time.

So the question remains, if this situation happens again in the future would do the same thing?

[countryboy]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

Probably not, but we can only control ourselves. I know it's probably a crappy way to look at the world, but honestly I have no expectation of other people. There's just so many crappy people in the world, some of whom if they accidentally bumped into you would just as soon spit on you as to say I'm sorry.

Honestly, my take is if the person was a decent human being they would have apologized without having to be told to; and if they didn't apologize right away it would have said to me that they're not interested in apologizing. You can't force someone in to doing something they don't want to do, things just go South quickly when that happens.

I know that you feel that you protected your daughter, but demanding an apology really just made things worse, in my opinion. Simply because the guy is a PoS and PoS's generally don't apologize because they aren't sorry for their actions.

With that said once he started speaking I don't blame you for what you did. Although, as pointed out before that could have ended up terribly for everyone involved. Imagine how you daughter would have felt had you gotten KO'ed.... or if you went to jail. It's terrible what he said, but in the end letting him just go about his day, with you guys feeling slighted would have been better than what this escalated in to. Like the old saying goes "if you wrestle with a pig, you both get dirty and the pig likes it". You stooped to this guys level and even if he did get a few bumps and bruises he probably loved that he got to you in the end.

I understand that it could've ended terribly, as I look back on it. But in that moment in time, there is no thinking of consequences.

Not sure he got me in the end. I "defended/protected" my daughter, walked away without consequence, and he has/had a daily reminder not to mess with my family, and hopefully anyone's family again.

So the question remains, if this situation happens again in the future would do the same thing?

If I felt it needed to be handled the same way, in a heartbeat.

[Jr.]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

I still don't understand the whole point of this thread. If you believe you did the right thing and still do apparently, what's the point of looking for opinions?

[bigbob]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

If I was a bystander and heard someone say that, regardless of the situation, I feel I'd be in the wrong not to bitch toss him across the floor.

[ThreeKing]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

If I was a bystander and heard someone say that, regardless of the situation, I feel I'd be in the wrong not to bitch toss him across the floor.

I agree. If I was the Dad and didn't do anything, I'd feel guilty as hell. The second I heard that slang come out of his mouth, he would've been on the ground.

And by the way, I'm from the suburbs. lol

[countryboy]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

I still don't understand the whole point of this thread. If you believe you did the right thing and still do apparently, what's the point of looking for opinions?

Because I wanted to get other's take/opinions/advice on the situation. Just because I felt I did the right thing and still do, doesn't mean that I'm not open to hear/read what others have to say on the matter.

[Phobia]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

The thread seems to repeat itself over and over with the same people saying the same things.

Everyone handles themselves different than others, we are all individuals. Several would of got into a full blown fight, several would of walked away turning the other cheek, some might of got their point across with one simple line. However you cut it, we all would of handled it slightly different.

The thread has run its course, it is now just a bickering fest of who's "morals" or "view point" is more correct.

[countryboy]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

agreed Phobia. Going to PM mods to please lock.

[kehlis]

Re: Did I handle this situation incorrectly? Advice/opinion appreciated.

Closed per OP request.