I like the 2-1-2 low if I'm looking to push things offensively, but that's not always the best course of action. To add to what BlueNGold said, going 3-2 AND all out attack is going to leave so gaping holes behind your defense.
As far as playing against your friend, it sounds like you need to change it up. You're being as aggressive as possible and he's obviously figured out how to exploit the holes it leaves. If he's looking to pass to the goal, try the collapsing D strategy.
Overall, try playing more conservatively -- both in terms of strategy settings and what you do with your defender (ie, don't chase him & take away that pass) -- to throw him off his game. A good player can overcome the constant pressure you're trying to apply, especially if they know it's coming all the time...