Married guys, a few questions

[SPTO]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

Can also go so many ways w. that one.

Keep your head out of the gutter Foo!

[muggins]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

I plan on popping the question soon, but there is no way I'm going to spend 2 months' salary. I have a lot of other important things to pay for. Including saving for a house. Spending huge money on a piece of jewelry (which is NOT an investment, btw, who are you going to sell it to? Ebay?) is for schmucks. If you read about what DeBeers has done to manipulate the market you'll realize how much of a racket it is.

[p_rushing]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

I plan on popping the question soon, but there is no way I'm going to spend 2 months' salary. I have a lot of other important things to pay for. Including saving for a house. Spending huge money on a piece of jewelry (which is NOT an investment, btw, who are you going to sell it to? Ebay?) is for schmucks. If you read about what DeBeers has done to manipulate the market you'll realize how much of a racket it is.

Yeah when I heard about the 2 month's salary, I was shocked. You have plenty of other things to pay for when getting married. I guess it depends on the woman, but I don't think I would spend 2 months salary and I would hope that the woman I marry would not have to have a ring worth that much.

[mjb2124]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

If you read about what DeBeers has done to manipulate the market you'll realize how much of a racket it is.

It's definitely a racket. My opinion when I bought the ring was: if she really likes something within reason, that's what she'll get. Heck, I was even able to get 3K off the ring so that shows how much they manipulate the market. IMO, 2 months salary for a ring isn't that absurd though. Then again, I live by the theory that one should have at least 6 months salary that they can get to easily in case of emergencies (ie: money market/interest bearing savings or checking account...not a CD or IRA that can't be touched for a period of time).

With that said, everything depends on the individual situation. When I popped the question, I already owned a house, owned a car that was fully paid off, had all the furniture and things needed for a house and have invested money well. So spending a little more on a ring to get the right one was well worth it. It also is nice to hear so many people compliment my fiance on how clear and beautiful it is. Remember, bigger isn't always better. Clarity makes a huge difference.

PS - My other advice is to pay the ring in full. Don't put it on a CC or do anything like that (I know friends that have done this and they wind up paying it off for months after they're married). My theory is: if one can't pay it in cash when purchased, then they can't afford it.

[Brandwin]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

So the ring has been found (the one she wants) we looked a day or two after my first post about this and the first one she saw is the one she liked the most (went to about 6 different places) I am going to buy the ring today (cash only and really not that much) and then I will need to figure out when I am going to ask her and how.

Very exciting times. I can't wait!

[TJdaSportsGuy]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

Very exciting times. I can't wait!

Awesome dude! Good luck...don't be nervous.

[mjb2124]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

So the ring has been found (the one she wants) we looked a day or two after my first post about this and the first one she saw is the one she liked the most (went to about 6 different places) I am going to buy the ring today (cash only and really not that much) and then I will need to figure out when I am going to ask her and how.

Very exciting times. I can't wait!

Sounds like you're well on your way. Best of luck!

[RoyalBoyle78]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

I'm not going to ask my girlfriend to marry me sometime soon but I was thinking, when it comes down to the time to ask her, I am lost in what to do.

How did you go about choosing the endgagement ring? Did you let her pick it out? Did you surprise her?


I really wouldn't want her to pick out the ring, I want it to be a surprise, but I have no idea how to pick out rings.

How much did you pay? I was doing a little reserch and it seems like diamonds are pretty damn expensive... lol


Just curious and I know the guys at OS will have some advice.


Thanks in advance.

Hey Dookie, just keep this in mind, I just got reengaged last year, and I bought the ring on my own, and DIAMONDS over over rate and old news, there are great opinions out there, My girls ring main stone is a mystic topaz, it's in 18k white gold surrounded by little diamond, this day in age, women don't care for diamonds as much as they used to. My girl told me many times she doesn't like diamonds , she like stones, so the one I got she was just in love with it.

[KG]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

The 2-3 months salary is just a common measurement to go by if you're unsure on how much you spend assuming you are living comfortable. If you plan on being with this woman for life buy her what you can afford. You can always upgrade your ring (unless your soon to be wife is really sentimental) and even add onto it.

I just got engaged and asked my soon to be father-in-law for permission to marry her daughter. He was busy playing with his new phone he got and didnt realize what I was saying. Once his wife screamed at him to put the damn phone down he said it was cool.

[mjb2124]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

this day in age, women don't care for diamonds as much as they used to.

Be careful with that. Your girl might be that way, but I know many that want a nice diamond on their finger because they either like diamonds better or like the traditional aspect of a diamond.

Diamonds are most definitely over priced. That's why I've always told everyone I know to negotiate the purchase. It's like a car. No one in their right mind would buy a car without negotiating the price. Same holds true with a diamond...except a diamond will hold it's value.

[callmetaternuts]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

Good luck!!!!! Hope that it goes well. Keep us posted

[youvalss]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

this day in age, women don't care for diamonds as much as they used to

Unless we're talking about Kobe's wife...

[frostbyte06]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

Always remember you can upgrade the ring in the future, if you have a good girl then she would understand if your current financial situation didn't match your heart's desires. Besides it's an easy setup for something romantic/brownie points in the future.

[Brandwin]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

Question about asking the father...

Is there a certain way I should ask? Dinner, just ask in person or what? I think I might have found the time to do it.

She knows I have the ring, so anytime I try to do anything nice she will expect it, but she said we should have a picnic tomorrow evening. my thought is this, I can tell her I am going to make a dessert and write in letters will you marry me with the ring sitting on top. I won't let her see it until we are done, she goes to take the cake lid off and there it is.

last time we went for a long walk in a park she said she thought I was going to ask her then and was disappointed when I didn't Well now I have the element of surprise on my side againbecause she asked for the picnic not me. It might be a little cheesy, but I know she would love it and not expect it.

not sure if I will do it tomorrow evening or not. I am just having a hard time to find a creative way and I think that is better than just 'asking"

I dunno too much!

[callmetaternuts]

Re: Married guys, a few questions

Question about asking the father...

Is there a certain way I should ask? Dinner, just ask in person or what? I think I might have found the time to do it.

She knows I have the ring, so anytime I try to do anything nice she will expect it, but she said we should have a picnic tomorrow evening. my thought is this, I can tell her I am going to make a dessert and write in letters will you marry me with the ring sitting on top. I won't let her see it until we are done, she goes to take the cake lid off and there it is.

last time we went for a long walk in a park she said she thought I was going to ask her then and was disappointed when I didn't Well now I have the element of surprise on my side againbecause she asked for the picnic not me. It might be a little cheesy, but I know she would love it and not expect it.

not sure if I will do it tomorrow evening or not. I am just having a hard time to find a creative way and I think that is better than just 'asking"

I dunno too much!

You dont have to do dinner, or anything. You can, if thats how you guys interact, or you can go over and ask to speak with him and ask him. It all depends on your style and your relationship with her family.