Boy masturbates...to death

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  • trobinson97
    Lie,cheat,steal,kill: Win
    • Oct 2004
    • 16366

    #1

    Boy masturbates...to death



    Reports coming in from Brazil say that a 16-year-old boy has died after tossing himself off 42 times — without stopping.
    http://m24digital.com/en/2011/08/26/...ting-42-times/
    They further said that his attraction to women was extreme; he was attracted to all kind of women, regardless of texture physics, color and age.
    This dude's comments cracked me up.

    PS- Probably my biggest fear in life is dying while jerking off. Just like having a massive all systems fail heart attack right when you finish. Such a horribly embarrassing way to go out. Limp **** in hand, dried cum on your hands, cum rag draped on your chest. Not exactly the way you want your mom to remember you by.
    Seriously jacked up situation but damn, 42 times in a row?! This kid had to be a mutant.
    PS: You guys are great.

    SteamID - Depotboy



    ...2009, 2011, 2012, 2015, 2017, 2020....
    What a run
    Roll Tide




  • stlpimpmonsta
    MVP
    • Aug 2011
    • 1545

    #2
    Re: Boy masturbates...to death

    sorry but im dying right now

    smh what a way to go!!!

    Comment

    • Marino
      Moderator
      • Jan 2008
      • 18113

      #3
      Re: Boy masturbates...to death

      Sometimes you have to go hard in the paint.

      Comment

      • Graphik
        Pr*s*n*r#70460649
        • Oct 2002
        • 10582

        #4
        Re: Boy masturbates...to death

        I had some serious sessions when I was a teen myself but 42 times? Good god, at some point you gotta lose feeling down there.
        http://neverfollow.biz (Independent Music Group)

        Comment

        • Whitesox
          Closet pyromaniac
          • Mar 2009
          • 5287

          #5
          Re: Boy masturbates...to death

          Originally posted by trobinson97
          http://www.themorningstarr.co.uk/201...self-to-death/


          This dude's comments cracked me up.


          Seriously jacked up situation but damn, 42 times in a row?! This kid had to be a mutant.


          I have a feeling this is fake, though.

          If not, that's insane, and terrible.

          EDIT: Well, the original article (in Portuguese) states that he had 600 million photos and 17 million erotic videos on his computer, so I'm gonna call fake.
          Last edited by Whitesox; 09-08-2011, 06:13 PM.
          My guide to MLB: The show

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          Comment

          • TracerBullet
            One Last Job
            • Jun 2009
            • 22119

            #6
            Re: Boy masturbates...to death

            Originally posted by BlueNGold
            I feel weird for liking a post about exposed penises.

            Comment

            • TheShizNo1
              Asst 2 the Comm Manager
              • Mar 2007
              • 26341

              #7
              So now, I'll tell my players they'll die from it instead of going blind.
              Originally posted by Mo
              Just once I'd like to be the one they call a jerk off.
              Originally posted by Mo
              You underestimate my laziness
              Originally posted by Mo
              **** ya


              ...

              Comment

              • Graphik
                Pr*s*n*r#70460649
                • Oct 2002
                • 10582

                #8
                Re: Boy masturbates...to death

                Originally posted by Marino
                Sometimes you have to go hard in the paint.

                Lmao, I guess you can say he was hard and was tryna paint his room.
                http://neverfollow.biz (Independent Music Group)

                Comment

                • 42
                  Hall Of Fame
                  • Feb 2009
                  • 8801

                  #9
                  Re: Boy masturbates...to death

                  Who was keeping score?

                  Comment

                  • OSUFan_88
                    Outback Jesus
                    • Jul 2004
                    • 25642

                    #10
                    Re: Boy masturbates...to death

                    Jesus, this can happen?!

                    ...I'm a survivor.
                    Too Old To Game Club

                    Urban Meyer is lol.

                    Comment

                    • TheShizNo1
                      Asst 2 the Comm Manager
                      • Mar 2007
                      • 26341

                      #11
                      Originally posted by 42
                      Who was keeping score?
                      LMAO! helluva point. Maybe he had goals? Checklist? Going for 50.

                      For some reason a song popped in my head. The song from the South Park episode when they kept trying to lost their baseball games on purpose.
                      Originally posted by Mo
                      Just once I'd like to be the one they call a jerk off.
                      Originally posted by Mo
                      You underestimate my laziness
                      Originally posted by Mo
                      **** ya


                      ...

                      Comment

                      • ehh
                        Hall Of Fame
                        • Mar 2003
                        • 28959

                        #12
                        Re: Boy masturbates...to death

                        Originally posted by 42
                        Who was keeping score?
                        That's exactly what I first thought. Did he keep a running tally that they found after he died?
                        "You make your name in the regular season, and your fame in the postseason." - Clyde Frazier

                        "Beware of geeks bearing formulas." - Warren Buffet

                        Comment

                        • Marino
                          Moderator
                          • Jan 2008
                          • 18113

                          #13
                          Re: Boy masturbates...to death

                          Originally posted by 42
                          Who was keeping score?
                          He had a white board, would write down the tally after each finish.

                          Spoiler

                          Comment

                          • Whitesox
                            Closet pyromaniac
                            • Mar 2009
                            • 5287

                            #14
                            Re: Boy masturbates...to death

                            Originally posted by 42
                            Who was keeping score?
                            42...

                            OS mod, the answer to life, the universe, and everything, and the number of times you apparently need to masturbate in a row to kill yourself.
                            My guide to MLB: The show

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                            Comment

                            • areobee401
                              Hall Of Fame
                              • Apr 2006
                              • 16771

                              #15
                              Re: Boy masturbates...to death

                              You can die from doing the 5 knuckle shuffle?

                              The bad - a young man died doing what he loves.

                              The good - one less John Cena fan.
                              http://twitter.com/smittyroberts

                              Comment

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