Phobias

[SuperBowlNachos]

Re: Phobias

I am fine being in an airplane or inside of a tall building, but outside on a balcony or something, screw that.

Spiders are my ultimate fear though. The one normal fear I have never gotten is snakes. You might as well be scared of a gecko.

[BurghFan]

Re: Phobias

I am fine being in an airplane or inside of a tall building, but outside on a balcony or something, screw that.

Spiders are my ultimate fear though. The one normal fear I have never gotten is snakes. You might as well be scared of a gecko.

You mean you don't understand why people are scared of snakes? Though I don't mind snakes, I can totally understand why people would be afraid of them. Sure, a lot of snakes are harmless (i.e. Garter snakes), but there are also a fair number that have wicked looking fangs and can give a nasty and even dangerous (venomous) bite. Even the larger constrictors can be quite dangerous. I don't see how you can compare being afraid of snakes to being afraid of geckos.

[LowerWolf]

Re: Phobias

I'm with you and completely understand. It's not as simple as people think. I go so far out of my way to avoid contact with people. Before I take my dog for his walk I check out the windows and observe who is outside and plan a route before I even step out of the apartment. I have to make sure the maintenance dudes aren't in the parking lot, have to make sure the talkative guy in the opposite building isn't on his balcony grabbing a smoke because he'll definitely try and talk to me, and just make sure in general no one is around.

I'm not quite to that extreme but I can definitely relate.

[Weeks]

Re: Phobias

I agree with you 100% I want to branch out so bad. Its just so hard for me. I do miss out on so many thing because of my phobias.

I'm with you and completely understand. It's not as simple as people think. I go so far out of my way to avoid contact with people. Before I take my dog for his walk I check out the windows and observe who is outside and plan a route before I even step out of the apartment. I have to make sure the maintenance dudes aren't in the parking lot, have to make sure the talkative guy in the opposite building isn't on his balcony grabbing a smoke because he'll definitely try and talk to me, and just make sure in general no one is around.

Hey guys, here are some tips I have for becoming more "social" or "interactive" or whatever you wanna call it. I know what you guys have been through (like being scared knowing that someone is going to talk to you), and it sucks because you hate not being able to converse like a "regular" person, but you just can't.

this is what worked for me (I'm not like outgoing or anything near that, but if you met me in public you wouldn't think I was anything out of the ordinary):

Make small talk. I know it sucks and is hard, but I think you get nervous because you can't make small talk, so you just stand there awkwardly not saying anything so you get worried what they think of you. The key is to ask questions, and pick an experience and say something. So if someone is like "hey, Pvarck" and then your like "whats up Joe?" then they'll say something like "How's it going?" and instead of just saying "fine", force yourself to say something like "I'm kind of tired, didn't really sleep" and they'll be like "that sucks", and your say "I know, it's been tough working today" etc. and then if they don't say anything and it starts to get awkward, say something like "did you see the game?" or another question to get THEM to start talking.

Smile. I don't know if you already do, but smiling makes people more comfortable. And once I started brushing more and getting whiter teeth, smiling definitely can help raise you confidence.

these two will help you immensely (or they did for me). Once you start making small talk, you learn that you can, get more confident, meet more people, get more comfortable around them so for the future it isn't as awkward.

just basically, force yourself to say something. you mentioned that unless your around people you feel comfortable with, you panic. it is because (IMO) your comfortable with what your saying so you talk more, and you never get to that point in the conversation where it becomes very akward.

hopefully this can help you guys out. just forcing myself to do these two things helped a ton, and like I said I know what you have to deal with, and it blows

[Fresh Tendrils]

Re: Phobias

You have no idea how hard it was for me to take this photo...and I don't know why either. It's not like you're going anywhere. But man it was difficult.

Spoiler

Hahaha....NOPE.

[Phobia]

Re: Phobias

I agree with you 100% I want to branch out so bad. Its just so hard for me. I do miss out on so many thing because of my phobias.

I'm with you and completely understand. It's not as simple as people think. I go so far out of my way to avoid contact with people. Before I take my dog for his walk I check out the windows and observe who is outside and plan a route before I even step out of the apartment. I have to make sure the maintenance dudes aren't in the parking lot, have to make sure the talkative guy in the opposite building isn't on his balcony grabbing a smoke because he'll definitely try and talk to me, and just make sure in general no one is around.

I don't want you guys to think I was "down playing" y'all issue, cause I'm not. I'm just saying try your best not to let it run your life because you will miss out on part of the beauty it is to live. Social interaction is fantastic, whether it is making small talk with some hot girl you have no intention of trying to "holla" at or all the way down the line to talking to some older guy you never met about the up coming election. There is a lot to experience on a day to day basis with people you never felt comfortable with.

Here is a "exercise" I guess you can call it, I do in the pool hall we go to or a bar. Practice talking to the bar maid, it is a good way to get comfortable speaking to a stranger AND a female all in one shot. Her JOB is to communicate and serve drinks to you. So ask her name, is she in college, where she is from, how she likes working at _______, etc etc. It is a good way to practice "game" also, just act like your getting to know her. Then throw in a few jabs at hitting on her and loosen your comfort zone some. At the end of the day she is serving YOU drinks lol.

[Chef Matt]

Re: Phobias

Tight spaces, especially in cars. Lately this one has gotten even worse. I can't ride in the backseat of a car anymore, and can't ride long distances in the passenger seat. I'm fine if I'm driving, but I will panic if I'm in the passenger seat going a long distance and there isn't anywhere to pull over and get out.

I've been dealing with this one too lately. When I'm in control...no problem. The moment I'm in the passenger seat...Panic mode. And back seat? No stinking way. Luckily, I'm the dad, I do the driving.

[Phobia]

Re: Phobias

I've been dealing with this one too lately. When I'm in control...no problem. The moment I'm in the passenger seat...Panic mode. And back seat? No stinking way. Luckily, I'm the dad, I do the driving.

I do this with my father-in-law only lol. I can't ride with him, he scares the living **** out of me!

[Chef Matt]

Re: Phobias

I do this with my father-in-law only lol. I can't ride with him, he scares the living **** out of me!

Mine too! Haha. And I'm finding even riding with my own dad has become a small challenge. Mind you, he's a truck driver and I grew up with him driving us all over the country without an incident. Seems irrational, but alot of phobias are.

[PhilliesFan13]

Re: Phobias

Sharks. I'm terrified of them.

Agreed! 100%!

I am terrified of sharks and the ocean. When I go to the beach in the summer, I do not step one toe in the water. I don't mind being on the sand, but the water is a no-no.

I tell ya, I have an awesome wife who puts up with me and my quirks. She is understanding about them all, but she does enjoy poking fun at me too. lol.

[AUChase]

Re: Phobias

There are very few people who I'm relaxed enough to ride with for long distances. My parents and closest friends and that's where I draw the line.

I know tragedy can strike anyone, anywhere. I just feel better about riding with certain people. I would rather be the one driving, usually.

[Nature_Boy]

Re: Phobias

I have a terrible fear of heights.

[av7]

Spiders and snakes. Kill it with fire, then more napalm.

I really hated getting to the Baja house my dad built. Once we got there, we had to check for snakes and they (Rattlesnakes)typically enjoyed to die under the sheets in any given bed. Outside of the house, they liked to hang out on or around cactus because that's what *******s do.

[cranes74us]

Re: Phobias

1. Spiders
2. Flying bugs getting inside my ear or nose lol

They get inside and start the colony inside my head or something.

[Candyman5]

Re: Phobias

1. Talking to woman - It sucks, once I get to know them I can say anything but getting to that point sucks. Maybe its all the bad luck I have around them or something but I feel as if I am just wasting their time doing something a lot more interesting than talking to me. Depending on the day it gets really bad to the point I start sweating and choking up. I know its pathetic and I know that. I tried going to strip clubs and bars and talk to woman there but then I feel even worse thinking that the only reason they talk to me is because its their job.....:/.

2. Spiders - I remember one distinct night mare I had when I was a kid. I woke up and the room was filled with nothing but Spiders and Snakes. The Walls, the ceiling, the floor were all covered. I then try to wake up only for me to wake back up in the same dream only this time there were more spiders and snakes. I tried waking up like 5 more times before finally waking up in a pool of sweat and tears in my eyes. The one before I woke up was the worse however because every inch of my body was covered in spiders as well so when I woke I grabbed my Gameboy and played Pokemon until I had to get up for school.