In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

[mgoblue]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

I agree overall with wwharton, but I will say that if you're in a good relationship it's usually a good idea to not be chatting with exes often....a lot of times exes are poison looking to screw up what people have.

I know I wouldn't have been happy if my then gf's ex was trying to get back with her after we were exclusive, you know? Secret texts to an ex are a nasty secret and can ruin relationships IMO.

I do think it's good that TMagic's evaluating what he wants out of the relationship.

[TMagic]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

So I broke it off with my current.

It was tough. But we decided that we can try just being friends.

It might take some time (and her finding another dude that fits her better), but I can see it working.

I honestly think we make way better friends than partners.

[bigeastbumrush]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

So I broke it off with my current.

It was tough. But we decided that we can try just being friends.

It might take some time (and her finding another dude that fits her better), but I can see it working.

I honestly think we make way better friends than partners.

And before you go hopping that fence back to where you came from thinking the grass is greener

[kaletore11]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

Props to you for breaking it off, that's never an easy thing to do, even when it's the right one.

[mgoblue]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

Props to you for breaking it off, that's never an easy thing to do, even when it's the right one.

I agree....it wasn't something that was gonna be long term, so better off to step back and think about what you want. The ex may or may not be that, but at least you can think about that without being a sleazeball.

[Yeah...THAT Guy]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

So I broke it off with my current.

It was tough. But we decided that we can try just being friends.

It might take some time (and her finding another dude that fits her better), but I can see it working.

I honestly think we make way better friends than partners.

Assuming that you're pretty sure this was the right decision for you, good job man. Never easy.

Not sure if you've been here before, but the whole "being friends" thing, in my experience, will take a good amount of time before it can become any sort of reality.

In my experience, when I broke things off with my ex, she cried on the phone but took it pretty well and agreed to be friends. She then followed it up by trying to spread rumors that I was cheating on her left and right around my campus (because ironically enough, even though she didn't go to my college, her roommate's older brother was the VP of my fraternity at my school) and trying to make my life a living hell. We're okay with each other now, but we never became friends again after that, but we still occasionally talk (and my current girlfriend knows when I hear from her).

Having said all that, I'm glad that you took your time in making your decision. These kinds of things aren't the types of decisions you want to make hastily. If you break up before you have a chance to process everything, you might end up having huge regrets. It's much easier to get legit closure when you think it through.

I hope everything that I said made sense. I generally think I do a pretty good job of handling relationship issues, but I'm not as good at actually expressing my thoughts about it lol. Anyways, I recommend taking some time to yourself to clear your head from your now-ex before you even start thinking about hooking up with the old ex.

[Heroesandvillains]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

I think TMagic summed it up perfectly but I still wanted to response since I know my first response to you was kind of harsh.

Hey man, I appreciate it. No harm no foul. We're all OS friends here and I respect you taking the time to explain why you said it in detail!

We can agree to disagree, but your thought process has you headed for controlling relationships that are unhealthy.

What the ****???? From a four-string response on an OS thread?



Just playing. I just found this pretty amusing after the first part. LOL!

[wwharton]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

Hey man, I appreciate it. No harm no foul. We're all OS friends here and I respect you taking the time to explain why you said it in detail!



What the ****???? From a four-string response on an OS thread?



Just playing. I just found this pretty amusing after the first part. LOL!

lol. It wasn't meant as a personal jab at all. Handle yours however you feel best suits you. If it's not working though, something to think about.

[Koolie G]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

When is the "TMagic is a free man" party?

LET ME BE CLEAR: I love my wife and am not looking to be single at all...............................

but all of us married folk can't help but remember the times when we could do whatever we wanted and didn't have to check with someone to see if it was OK, or worry about them getting mad if we did it anyway. Didn't have to worry about keeping stuff clean around the house if we didn't want to, could play video games all night, play golf everyday, go see my boys on a moments notice for a weekend getaway, etc.

Obviously a marriage is about some sacrifices and I pretty much get to do those things I mentioned above whenever I feel like it(my wife is pretty awesome), but there is always another person to consider when you are married. When you are single, the only person you have to worry about is you and that is freeing on some level.

[MrSerendipity]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

Well I just read through all 12 pages of that and I think you made the right decision. Your path might eventually lead you into the arms of either one of those girls but I think right now you need to figure some stuff out on your own. Just don't jump right back into things with the ex just because you're no longer bound to another person.

[the_future420]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

Well I just read through all 12 pages of that and I think you made the right decision. Your path might eventually lead you into the arms of either one of those girls but I think right now you need to figure some stuff out on your own. Just don't jump right back into things with the ex just because you're no longer bound to another person.

I have advice, but its probably not the best so I'll keep it to myself, but how is this a 12 page thread? Only page 3 for me

[mb625]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

Well I just read through all 12 pages of that and I think you made the right decision. Your path might eventually lead you into the arms of either one of those girls but I think right now you need to figure some stuff out on your own. Just don't jump right back into things with the ex just because you're no longer bound to another person.

Someone doesn't use the 40 posts per page option.

[Nathan_OS]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

Lol, I'm watching Chicago Code and Jarred is having the same exact problem you're having.

If no one has ever watched Chicago Code, this might be a horrible reference lol.

[MrSerendipity]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

Someone doesn't use the 40 posts per page option.

I mean, maybe I have a thing for clicking.

[TMagic]

Re: In Need Of Some Serious Advice (Yes. Relationship Issues)

So to update...

I met up with my old Ex to see how things would be between us. I surprised her with a cruise to the Bahamas. Lol

Now I know that it seems like a lot. And at the beginning, it did feel like a bit much for not seeing her in 4 years. But leading up to the trip, it didnt feel weird at all.

The trip went really well. Didnt even feel like its been 4 years since we last were together. It was so comfortable, natural, and the chemistry came so easy. I was convinced we were going to be together.

But the WEIRDEST thing is, even though everything went well, I came back liking my current ex even more!

So I kept going back and forth about which girl is right for me. Why I was feeling the way I was.

I came to the conclusion that with my most recent ex, I didnt give a fair shake, or even try to work on our issues. I think when my old ex hit me up, I started losing interest in my current because through all these years, I wanted her to want me back so bad.

So now, Ive decided to try to work on things with my recent ex.

I feel terrible because the other girl was all about moving out here to Cali (shes in florida) to be with me. Shes going to be heartbroken.