Separate but living together

Collapse

Recommended Videos

Collapse
X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • oneamongthefence
    Nothing to see here folks
    • Apr 2009
    • 5683

    #1

    Separate but living together

    So my wife has decided that we are no longer together and we are now separated. We will continue to live together in the short term while she gets a car, license job etc. And also for our 2 kids. Has anyone ever had an arrangement like this and have some advice on living this way.

    This is not a test.
    Because I live in van down by the river...
  • racerx
    Bills Mafia!!
    • Jul 2002
    • 2384

    #2
    Re: Separate but living together

    My ex and I got divorced in January and we lived together in the house until June when she moved out. I'm still living at the house as we are trying to sell it. So it does happen.
    NFL - Buffalo Bills
    MLB - St Louis Cardinals
    NCAA Football - Michigan Wolverines
    NCAA Basketball - UK Wildcats

    Comment

    • djp73
      Coach Porter Davis
      • Jun 2009
      • 8504

      #3
      Re: Separate but living together

      toxic situation, get out of there
      ---

      Comment

      • IndianBird
        MVP
        • Nov 2004
        • 2909

        #4
        Re: Separate but living together

        Sounds like hell
        I'm a Vince McMahon Guy!

        On, On, On, To Victory!!

        Gamertag: stewgilligan

        Comment

        • oneamongthefence
          Nothing to see here folks
          • Apr 2009
          • 5683

          #5
          Re: Separate but living together

          I know it's not ideal. I did draw up a roommate agreement of sorts though.

          This is not a test.
          Because I live in van down by the river...

          Comment

          • SPTO
            binging
            • Feb 2003
            • 68046

            #6
            Re: Separate but living together

            I have no experience in this but that does sound rather toxic. It's a good thing you drew up some kind of an agreement but I think the best thing for you to do is either one of you move out ASAP.
            Member of the Official OS Bills Backers Club

            "Baseball is the most important thing that doesn't matter at all" - Robert B. Parker

            Comment

            • racerx
              Bills Mafia!!
              • Jul 2002
              • 2384

              #7
              Re: Separate but living together

              It was very stressful doing it for 6 months, we have a 7 year old so it was more of a transitional thing for him thats why we did it that way. I will tell you I am so much more stress free now that she is out.
              NFL - Buffalo Bills
              MLB - St Louis Cardinals
              NCAA Football - Michigan Wolverines
              NCAA Basketball - UK Wildcats

              Comment

              • oneamongthefence
                Nothing to see here folks
                • Apr 2009
                • 5683

                #8
                Re: Separate but living together

                Well we talked about it some and it may just be for a few months and see how it goes. We are undecided about seeing other people. I have no inclination to because I don't really like going out and I'm not giving up kid and video game time for somebody else.

                This is not a test.
                Because I live in van down by the river...

                Comment

                • Darkleaf
                  MVP
                  • Feb 2006
                  • 1685

                  #9
                  Re: Separate but living together

                  Once they meet someone else while you are at home playing videogames and watching the kids things get real bad quick. I would hope you would take the time to have fun of your own, would hurt even more if you spent 6 months thinking its all gonna be ok and she spends 6 months moving on for good. Best to get out quick before things get really messy. I really hope you are preparing some kind of exit plan/strategy these things can sneak up on you meanwhile they were 6 months ahead and you had no clue.

                  Comment

                  • Keirik
                    MVP
                    • Mar 2003
                    • 3770

                    #10
                    Re: Separate but living together

                    Sounds toxic but hear this out. My parents did this when i was a kid. Im guessing around 13 years old or so. It was very obvious what was going on and it was very tense. However, my parents eventually fell back in love i think and never divorced, remained together until my father passed away from cancer 20 years later.

                    The second another person comes into the mix it will get very very bad.
                    Yankees, Manchester United, Chicago Bears, New York Rangers

                    Comment

                    • oneamongthefence
                      Nothing to see here folks
                      • Apr 2009
                      • 5683

                      #11
                      Re: Separate but living together

                      My kids are 3 and 4. Its just not feasible right now for her to move right now and I'm not gonna leave my kids. Its my parents house so I wouldn't leave anyway. We've talked about seeing other people. I'm not for it but she's encouraging me to go out and try.

                      This is not a test.
                      Because I live in van down by the river...

                      Comment

                      • seasprite
                        Phenom
                        • Jul 2008
                        • 8984

                        #12
                        Re: Separate but living together

                        Originally posted by oneamongthefence
                        My kids are 3 and 4. Its just not feasible right now for her to move right now and I'm not gonna leave my kids. Its my parents house so I wouldn't leave anyway. We've talked about seeing other people. I'm not for it but she's encouraging me to go out and try.

                        This is not a test.
                        Man, this will get ugly and get ugly quick. She is encouraging you so she can feel like she has a pass to do it if you call her out on it. Trust me, for your own good, get out of the situation however you can. It may seem wrong for the kids at the moment, but in the long run it will be the best thing. I have seen it happen several times and not a single time did it not end in a bad way. Just my .02






                        Comment

                        • ImTellinTim
                          YNWA
                          • Sep 2006
                          • 33028

                          #13
                          Re: Separate but living together

                          She decided that you just weren't together any more? Then she needs to learn what that decision means. Right now she's living in a house that isn't hers with no job, no car, no bills, etc. Sweet deal for her.

                          But I do understand that there's other factors with kids involved.

                          Sounds like a ****ty situation.

                          Comment

                          • mgoblue
                            Go Wings!
                            • Jul 2002
                            • 25477

                            #14
                            Re: Separate but living together

                            I think my brother in law is in this situation...his ex will be trying to find a place, but until then I think they're living together....
                            Nintendo Switch Friend Code: SW-7009-7102-8818

                            Comment

                            • DocHolliday
                              Farewell and 'ado
                              • Oct 2002
                              • 4698

                              #15
                              Re: Separate but living together

                              You, your separated wife and 2 children are living at your parents house, while she "encourages" you to see other people? And your cool with this as long as you have video games and some kid time?

                              Bro you might have convinced yourself this is not a messed up situation, but trust me/us, it very much is.


                              Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
                              GT: Event Horizon 0

                              Comment

                              Working...