Separate but living together

[bigeastbumrush]

Re: Separate but living together

And unless he has some sort of proof, then her lawyer could say that he made all of that up and if becomes a game of "he said, she said".

That being said I don't have kids and have never been in a custody battle. What little I know about the subject comes from when I happen to look up from my phone while my wife is watching Teen Mom 2. Lol.

I do know that the longer he waits the more time it gives her to get her stuff together. Which is why my only advice is to do whatever he can to protect himself and his kids by getting out in front of this. If that takes getting a personal loan from the bank or a relative, then so be it.

Yeah. I know of a guy who won full custody of his son. So it is possible.

But this guy needs to document everything. And yeah...the sooner, the better.

[p_rushing]

Re: Separate but living together

Wife has no income and has admitted to spending the night *wink wink* at another man's house.

Any lawyer worth their salt would give the TS a puncher's chance at full custody.

She has 0 income which means he will be paying her and for the kids.


Better get a lawyer to minimize your loss. I would at least do a free consultation and see if you can get her to sign something that removes you from paying her alimony and see if you can get custody or some kind of split.

Sent from my KFTHWI

[bigeastbumrush]

Re: Separate but living together

She has 0 income which means he will be paying her and for the kids.


Better get a lawyer to minimize your loss. I would at least do a free consultation and see if you can get her to sign something that removes you from paying her alimony and see if you can get custody or some kind of split.

Sent from my KFTHWI

Not in all cases.

[oneamongthefence]

Re: Separate but living together

The state I love in is very pro mother. (mississippi) my options are to live with it or get a dovoexe resulting in split custody if not just visitation as I have seen in some cases. Its like a rock and a hard place. I'm not gonna give up my kids for anything even if it's only partial.

This is not a test.

[seasprite]

Re: Separate but living together

The state I love in is very pro mother. (mississippi) my options are to live with it or get a dovoexe resulting in split custody if not just visitation as I have seen in some cases. Its like a rock and a hard place. I'm not gonna give up my kids for anything even if it's only partial.

This is not a test.

If you are at all interested in living a happy and fulfilling life, this isn't an option. Also, like I have said before, living in this crap isn't good for your children either and they will suffer.

[racerx]

Re: Separate but living together

If you are at all interested in living a happy and fulfilling life, this isn't an option. Also, like I have said before, living in this crap isn't good for your children either and they will suffer.

Totally agree with this, my son was hurt at first but now he feels like he has 2 houses to go to.

[jeremym480]

Re: Separate but living together

The state I love in is very pro mother. (mississippi) my options are to live with it or get a dovoexe resulting in split custody if not just visitation as I have seen in some cases. Its like a rock and a hard place. I'm not gonna give up my kids for anything even if it's only partial.

This is not a test.

If she was down with wanting to be a family and making it work, then maybe I would at least consider this. However, if she's not, then I'm afraid you're just delaying the inevitable.

[fatleg3]

Re: Separate but living together

Yea with the last update you gave op, i would give you the same advice everyone else here is giving. Seek legal advice and see what your options are.

My mom and dad lived together all the way until i was in high school but yet they weren't together. They divorced sometime soon after my little sister was born in 94. I think my dad finally moved out around 02. They did it to have both parents in one household for me, my older brother, and younger sister. Of course in any situation like that there will be some problems but they made it work because they cared about us more than any other thing in this world. But they weren't running off with old friends then trying to make it seem like nothing either.

So from being in a situation somewhat like you are trying to do, i understand. But at sometime, you have to realize when you are being played as a fool. She gets to live for free, and see other people. I dont know her to judge her parenting skills but besides being a mother, what does she bring to the table? Does she at least cook, and take care of the household? Please dont tell me you also watch the kids while she goes out and about to do whatever. You have to just man up and take control of the situation.

And not to use your situation as an example, but this is the perfect reason why im in no rush to marry or have kids. People change.

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[longshadow11]

Re: Separate but living together

How old are the kids? I won custody because my oldest chose me over her mom. Also, getting temporary custody just about wins the war. If you can manage to win temporary custody, then do it. Of course, you have to have money. My lawyer's bill was $9,000, and that was with my wife giving up. However, I used every thing I could to lean on her hard and make her want to give up and not go to court. When it comes to fighting for your kids and for what's morally right, fight as hard as you can, but do it smartly. I was fortunate to have family members advising me, and we had "war sessions" in which we talked and planned. I wish the best for you; I've been there and it is absolutely horrible. Not only are you dealing with betrayal, but you fear the loss of your children. It's a nightmare, but stay strong, pray, and know life will get better.

[oneamongthefence]

Re: Separate but living together

It's probably the fear keeping me from doing anything right now. I'm also in school right now as well as working so that doesn't help either I don't think.

This is not a test.

[longshadow11]

Re: Separate but living together

I have felt that fear and remember the feeling vividly. I really feel for you. PM your name to me if you want and I will add you to my prayers. Do what is right and somewhere down the road you will be blessed. I will be thinking of you and praying for an outcome which will be the best for your kids and you.

[Sinner]

Re: Separate but living together

So last night she came out and said that she is talking to someone else. One of my high friends in fact. Its nothing serious. Her words. She went over to his house and stayed overnight but nothing has happened. Her words. She doesn't want to commit to him since I'm holding her captive with the kids.

This is not a test.

I've never been married so if I'm wrong here anybody just tell me but..

If I read through this thread right you're both living in your parents house right? So since she feels you are holding her "captive" tell her to move out. Both of you living together like this isn't doing much for the kids, they will pick up on things not being right and that does have an effect.

This seems like it could lead to a lot of drama if it hasn't already and from someone who grew up with parents arguing all the time it's the worse. If she wants to be with that dude so bad hell she can go move in with him...or maybe some friend of hers or family if she has some close. But she needs to be out of that house ASAP...and something to think about document all the things that she does or says while ya'll are technically married.

I don't know how the law is where you're at but hell use your phone and record her saying she's been spending time with this guy and spent the night with him. I mean you need to be doing whatever you can to help you and your kids situation