Never Surrender - The Worst Movie Ever Made (Spoiler Alert)

[Pappy Knuckles]

Never Surrender is the worst movie that I've ever seen. I watched it because it starred several mma fighters (BJ Penn, Rampage, Heath Herring, Anderson Silva, GSP). I heard that it sucked, but I had no idea it would be this terrible. It's one of those movies that's so ****ty that you just have to see it to believe it. This is kind of long, but I've attempted to break it down for you.


- The movie begins with GSP watching a fight of some dude named Diego, the star of the movie. We soon find out that they're friends. Diego is supposed to be a very successful fighter.

- Rampage and BJ Penn roll up in a car to meet with Diego. They get into a poorly correographed street fight with some dudes outside of the club. "You gotta pivot when you punch." - Rampage

- We meet Sandra. The so-called beauty of this movie who looks like a man.

- We meet Siefer, the villain. Siefer tells Diego that organized MMA is wack and he needs to fight in his underground organization. Whenever you win a fight you not only get money, you also get to take your opponents "consort". So basically these dudes are fighting for *****.

- Diego wins his first fight. Instead of taking one of the good looking women being offered to him, he requests the company of manly Sandra.

- Diego knocks boots with Sandra. Softcore sex scene #1.

- Diego starts training for his fight against some steroid dude named Crusher. He has no trainer for this fight, but he uses the perfect push up.

- Diego has been missing in action for a while so GSP calls him up to see where he's been. Since he gets no response he drives to Diego's mansion. When GSP gets to the front door some security dude tells him that visiting hours are over and hits him with a superman punch. They have a ****ty fight that ends with GSP putting him in some crazy looking hold and punching him in the back of the head.

- Once GSP gets past security he tells Diego that he needs to get out of illegal fighting. Diego says no.

- Diego fights Crusher and wins by double knee backflip to the stomach.

- Diego runs through another chick. More softcore porn.

- Heath Herring shows up and tries to teach Diego that he needs to fight smart. After a hard day of training the very next scene is of them at a bar.

- Diego beats some dude named Marco and wins another hoe.

- Girls swimming in the pool. A lot of breast showing.

- Heath and Diego sit by the pool, Heath tries to drop some life lessons.

- The hoe that Diego won from Marco tries to have sex with him. By this point, he has feelings for manly Sandra so he refuses. The hoe tells Diego that she could get hurt for not sleeping with him by Siefer. For some reason, Diego seems surprised that these girls are being forced to prostitute themselves. I guess the whole winning women thing never seemed strange to him.

- We get the story of Siefer

- Siefer beats up the hoe for not sleeping with Diego.

- Diego starts flipping out and breaking stuff in his house. Manly Sandra shows up. Diego tells her that he cares about her. They have another softcore sex scene.

- Siefer and Heath Herring fight. I'm not sure if he killed Herring in the cage or not, but he got beat down and they didn't say anything else about it.

- Diego tells Siefer that he's going to save the hoes from the prostitution. One of Siefer's goons pistol whips Diego while he stands next to the cage.

- A dude wants to fight and Diego says, "I don't have time for this." BJ Penn comes from behind him and says, "But I do." They have another ****ty street fight. BJ ends the fight by an armbar followed by a kick to the face.

- Diego walks around the corner and Anderson Silva is there. Another ****ty street fight begins. Eventually Diego wins the fight by kicking him in the face and Silva's head hitting a pillar.

- Diego fights off more of Siefer's goons. Some chick is tied up with her titty out.

- Some of Diego's loser friends bumrush the place and shooting breaks out. They escape outside where BJ Penn has been chilling out. They all start laughing and go to the club because it's been a hard night.

- A couple of dudes fight in a cage. Cecil Peoples is the ref.

- Diego has retired. He's a lover, not a fighter. He lives happily ever after with manly Sandra.

[allBthere]

LOL,

I read this aloud, so your efforts are appreciated.

It always bugs me when I see movies like this. I have acting training and have been in some indie films. These pro athletes and singers or whatever just assume they can do it w/o any training or experience. Some are more naturals than others, but COM'ON MAN!

Sounds all around bad though, bad writing, directing, producing, acting, editing - blah.

The best recent martial arts film was Red Belt which was pretty damn good imo. But it had some very good actors in it, otherwise it would have sucked ****.

[Keith121212]

Reading that recap made me literally LOL. I'm going to get it just to laugh.

[Bornindamecca]

Dude, that was brilliant. You should have a blog where you do summaries for movies you hate.

[Pappy Knuckles]

Lol. Man, this movie makes Never Back Down look like a masterpiece.

[Keith121212]

I just read this again and damn this is some funny ****.

[Vast]

Awesome!! My favorite quote "We meet Sandra. The so-called beauty of this movie who looks like a man." LMAO!!!

[damien6663]

ROFL that was pretty hilarious!