A Lottery of Despair: The Most Recent Return of Jimmy the Meatball

[JimmyTheMeatball]

Hot off the Press!
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Jimmy the Meatball is coming out of retirement and is shopping for management positions!
Watch out...he may be coming to ruin YOUR favorite club.

Investigative reporter Dimitri Keftes will be providing behind the scenes coverage of the upcoming debacle in a season-long series right here on the Operation Sports Dynasty HQ Forums.

Updates and backstory will also be available via YouTube and Facebook
When he finally lands a job, select matches will be live on Twitch
(links provided in the signature)

All the Backstory! Coming Soon!

Installment #1: A Lottery of Despair: The Most Recent Return of Jimmy the Meatball

Installment #2: He Would Have Been Hanged Had it Been Hartlepool

Installment #3: The Vomit Comet Incident and the End Of a Playing Career

All thanks goes out to everyone at the Operation Sports Community Sliders Forum. When gameplay starts I'll be using Set D with adjustments by Matt10. Without the Community Sliders Crews long hours of testing and dedication to providing a proper Simulation experience EAs FIFA 16 would be a shadow of itself. If this MM proves entertaining at all it's because of your work.
Links and Info will be provided as we go.

[JimmyTheMeatball]

A Lottery of Despair: The Most Recent Return of Jimmy the Meatball
Installment 1: Ipswich Town Blues

With the start of a new season fast approaching, hope springs forth for many a club and its supporters. However, In the lower leagues, lurks a shadow, a tragedy, a lottery of despair, so to speak.

Its name?

Jimmy the Meatball.

"Lottery of despair sums it up perfectly", says, Liam Whetshispants, a London-born Barcelona supporter who we met on the train to Ipswich. Liam added, "All of these lower league clubs, who have enough problems to deal with already, they are all looking at each other wondering who is going to get it". "It’s like some football-world version of The Dragonslayer”, Whetshispants went on, “and every year, without fail, the lower-leagues give up one of their own to the beast, so that the others may live”.

Liam: A Barca jersey AND a Dragonslayer reference?!...Pshew! Does yer mum know you're out?

It's not entirely exaggeration either. Stints managing both CS Sedan and Racing Santander saw both clubs not only fire him, but also free fall into the netherworld of FIFA non-inclusion...but more about that later.

We were traveling to Ipswich Town in an attempt to track down former Chairman David Sheepshanks (who still has personal connections to the club) in order to get some perspective on Jimmys one tumultuous year there. We managed to stop the normally genial former Chairman outside the club offices, but he palmed the camera lens and growled, "p%&s off you f@#ks", the very second we asked him about The Meatballs tenure at the Suffolk club. Needless to say, feelings are still raw after Jimmys one-year tenure, which saw the Tractor Boys circle the drain the entire season and ultimately relegated.


Sheepy? Not Really.He poked our cameraman in the eye

"Even after experiencing the likes of Keno or Jewell at the helm, Jimmy is still considered the worst", said a vagrant sipping bagged beer near Portman Road. The unnamed vagrant finished with a sigh, "Most people here try to forget as best they can…I just have less trouble forgetting than most".

"All I know is that the club did have its concerns", said a former Ipswich Town executive. "He was just coming off his stint at Sedan. He came highly recommended by Joe Royal, but later we learned that Big Fat Joe had been on a bender and met Jimmy in some bar in Turks and Caicos. Anyway, in Jimmy comes, all tanned up, unshaved, smelling like refer and baby powder, completely unkept. I thought he had better be a fooking genius because he looks like garbage. As he walked out of the office, I noticed that he had sand all over his back. Sand! From sleeping on some beach, but we were in administration, we were broke and desperate".

On our way out of the Ipswich Town offices we ran into Manager Mick McCarthy, who said if he ever saw Meatball in the street he would have Terry Conner punch him in the throat. “Why?”, we asked, and McCarthy, speaking through gritted teeth replied, "The office has smelt like an old onion sandwich since Jimmy left. It's putrid. We can’t take it anymore. Here I have a promotion challenge to mount and Terry and I are crawling around on all fours trying to figure out if that smell is coming from the carpet or the curtains".


McCarthy: Tired of smelling the carpet

Terry Connor pulled us aside after Mick Stormed off and added, “I already have to spend every fuc*%ng hour of every fuc*%ng day with Mick McCarthy. This is bull$hit! I have enough problems in my life”.


Connor: Also tired of smelling the carpet, but more tired of smelling Mick

Oh my!
Well then, next week in Installment 2: Spanish Sunshine and Royale with Cheese