Should your wife take your last name?

[Po Pimp]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

Guess I'll be the jerk, but I expect her to take my last name. What's next, my kids taking my wife's last name?

[jmood88]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

So for the guys who want her to is it just because that's how it's been or is there some other reason?

[Beantown]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

So for the guys who want her to is it just because that's how it's been or is there some other reason?

My parents are divorced and my mom still goes by my father's name. It's the kind of relationship I grew up in, and it is the kind of relationship I want to have.

I want to hear "Mr. and Mrs. Callaghan" and not have her say: "Actually, it's Mrs. -insert her last name here-."

Would it ruin the relationship if she didn't? No.

As I said in my original post, she can keep her name if she has some strong conviction to it, but any children are taking my last name. If she doesn't want that, that could ruin the relationship.

[The C]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

I think it conjures up weird things of possession. If you want it, take it. If you don't, who cares? I would actually take the women's name if she had an awesome last name.

[jmood88]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

My parents are divorced and my mom still goes by my father's name. It's the kind of relationship I grew up in, and it is the kind of relationship I want to have.

I want to hear "Mr. and Mrs. Callaghan" and not have her say: "Actually, it's Mrs. -insert her last name here-."

Would it ruin the relationship if she didn't? No.

As I said in my original post, she can keep her name if she has some strong conviction to it, but any children are taking my last name. If she doesn't want that, that could ruin the relationship.

My grandparents are divorced and my grandma still has my grandpa's last name so I understand that.

[SPTO]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

I want to hear "Mr. and Mrs. Callaghan" and not have her say: "Actually, it's Mrs. -insert her last name here-."

This brings up a point. There's a compromise to this as I remember in the '90s it was the in thing for the woman to go with a hyphenated name. So in your case "Mrs. (insert maiden name here)-Calaghan".

What do others think about that? Especially those that seem to think that if the wife doesn't take your name it means it's a loveless marriage/opening the door to the swinger lifestyle.

[mgoblue]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

I voted 'yes' but it's not that I think my wife should have to. I would like her too, though.

I do think the kids should (and I think they usually do) take the father's name, however.

I agree with you. I'd like her to, but if there's a good reason for her not to then that'd be fine. Some people don't for professional reasons, etc.

[Fluffhead]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

My wife was kind of bummed about losing her old name, but I didn't force it. I did mention that I didn't want my kids having hyphenated last names though. What happens when they get married, another hyphen? Plus the name takes up too much jersey space.

[pfunk880]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

everyone saying they don't care...I bet when it comes down to it you are going to darn well want her to

I would never MAKE her....but I would want a pretty good explanation as far as why she didn't want to or wouldn't. And I don't know, if she just flat out refused and didn't offer much explanation, it may end the relationship.

Just being honest

That pretty much sums up my feelings. Marriage is supposed to be a complete union of two people, and to me, the last name is an important (though symbolic) part of that.

If I get married, I'm not going to force my wife to take on my last name, but if she doesn't want to, I too would want a good reason (professional reasons would be acceptable, for example, as mgoblue mentioned).

[jmood88]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

But why is it a complete union where the woman is the only one who has to change her name?

[Cebby]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

What do others think about that? Especially those that seem to think that if the wife doesn't take your name it means it's a loveless marriage/opening the door to the swinger lifestyle.

Hyphenated names are terrible.

[pfunk880]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

But why is it a complete union where the woman is the only one who has to change her name?

If you want to take your wife's last name, more power to you.

[jmood88]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

lol that's not what I'm saying, I just don't see how it's an equal pairing when only one person has to change anything(name-wise)

[Beantown]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

Hey now, if the guy is the one who (seemingly) always has to pay child support if the couple gets divorced, the woman can suck it up and take her husband's last name.

[jmood88]

Re: Should your wife take your last name?

lol that's true.