Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

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  • JazzMan
    SOLDIER, First Class...
    • Feb 2012
    • 13547

    #406
    Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

    - I'm beginning to question my religion and whether or not there is a real God now that I'm getting older. I do believe that I am now Agnostic.

    - I'm 18 and a virgin, however my girlfriend and I have made several steps to the next level.

    - When I was 16, I fooled around with my best friend's sister when I spent the night at his house.

    - I live in fear thinking that my girlfriend is going to ditch me any moment now. This is the longest relationship I've been in at 5 months.

    - I had contemplated suicide in the past, but as I've matured I've realized that is simply not an option anymore. I think it was mostly just an attention issue, as I'm kind of just the average guy.

    - I've been offered beer and marijuana numerous times throughout high school by my classmates, but declined by giving lame excuses, like I have to be home early or I'm busy in the morning. I just simply don't want to do drugs or drink alcohol.
    Twitter: @TyroneisMaximus
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    • BDKiiing
      Best in the World
      • Jun 2008
      • 9334

      #407
      Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

      Originally posted by tyklug2013
      - I'm beginning to question my religion and whether or not there is a real God now that I'm getting older. I do believe that I am now Agnostic.

      - I'm 18 and a virgin, however my girlfriend and I have made several steps to the next level.

      - When I was 16, I fooled around with my best friend's sister when I spent the night at his house.

      - I live in fear thinking that my girlfriend is going to ditch me any moment now. This is the longest relationship I've been in at 5 months.

      - I had contemplated suicide in the past, but as I've matured I've realized that is simply not an option anymore. I think it was mostly just an attention issue, as I'm kind of just the average guy.

      - I've been offered beer and marijuana numerous times throughout high school by my classmates, but declined by giving lame excuses, like I have to be home early or I'm busy in the morning. I just simply don't want to do drugs or drink alcohol.
      That I respect, I was the opposite a few years back, but now that I've straightened out for the most part, I look back and wish I woulda been like that.
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      • Kriech23
        MVP
        • Feb 2009
        • 2302

        #408
        Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

        This isn't much compared to others, but I can't land an internship/co-op. I've had at least 10-15 interviews in this school year, if not more. I'm in my 2nd year at UC, in a number of honor societies/clubs, do community service and all that jazz. The problem is not getting the interview, the problem is hearing back from them or even getting an offer. I don't know if I'm "too honest" with my answers or if I lack enthusiasm in general. Ah, it more-so grinds my gears too.

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        • XtremeDunkz
          CNFL Commissioner
          • Aug 2007
          • 3414

          #409
          Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

          Originally posted by tyklug2013
          - I'm beginning to question my religion and whether or not there is a real God now that I'm getting older. I do believe that I am now Agnostic.

          - I'm 18 and a virgin, however my girlfriend and I have made several steps to the next level.

          - When I was 16, I fooled around with my best friend's sister when I spent the night at his house.

          - I live in fear thinking that my girlfriend is going to ditch me any moment now. This is the longest relationship I've been in at 5 months.

          - I had contemplated suicide in the past, but as I've matured I've realized that is simply not an option anymore. I think it was mostly just an attention issue, as I'm kind of just the average guy.

          - I've been offered beer and marijuana numerous times throughout high school by my classmates, but declined by giving lame excuses, like I have to be home early or I'm busy in the morning. I just simply don't want to do drugs or drink alcohol.
          Thinking like that is what will make it happen. Girls like the guy they are with to be confident. Worst thing you can do is be more emotional than she is.
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          • JazzMan
            SOLDIER, First Class...
            • Feb 2012
            • 13547

            #410
            Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

            Originally posted by XtremeDunkz
            Thinking like that is what will make it happen. Girls like the guy they are with to be confident. Worst thing you can do is be more emotional than she is.
            I fully agree. I've definitely gotten better in that sense, but I'm still by no means the most confident guy in the world.

            I think it boils down to my previous relationships. In the past, everything would be going great and then she'd leave and never talk to me again. That stuff hurts, man.
            Twitter: @TyroneisMaximus
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            • jeremym480
              Speak it into existence
              • Oct 2008
              • 18198

              #411
              Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

              Both of my grandfathers died a year or so before I was born (I'm 33 now). One was a alcoholic and died from cirrhosis of the liver and the other (my mom's father) committed suicide when my grandmother left him. I don't think my parents have ever really told me the whole story, but from what I've gathered over the years was that my grandmother told him that she wanted a divorce and he was committed to some sort of mental health facility. They gave him a room and for some reason didn't take his belt and he ended up hanging himself. My mom told me that when I was around 20, then left the room to go cry and has never talked about it with me since.

              Also my brother who is basically the same age as me (he's 10 and a half months older than me) has tried to commit suicide twice. The last time was about 10 years ago so hopefully he's over all of that now.
              It's a shame really. Since we were so close in age, we were always tight growing up, but when he turned 16 he got in with the wrong crowd and became addicted to drugs. He ended up trying to kill himself both times because him and his wife were having problems. I still think that he's a mentally weak individual and if his wife tried to leave him tomorrow I seriously think he would try to hurt himself again. Also he got caught with a meth lab in his home (while having two kids) and was on house arrest for two years in his early twenties. Honestly, when I see him now he doesn't even look like the same person that I knew 16-17 years ago. Plus with everything he put my mom and his family through I pretty much think of him as a P.O.S. We really only see each other on holidays when I'm back home outside of that I'm basically done with him.

              The moral of the story after seeing how suicide/attempted suicide has effected my mother (even 34-35 years later). There is no way in hell, I would ever consider it. I've been through some bad times (divorce, money problems, etc.), but the good thing about bad times is that there are usually brighter days ahead. Just keep your head up and do the best you can and I'm certain that things will work out the way they are supposed too.
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              • 55
                Banned
                • Mar 2006
                • 20857

                #412
                Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

                I have also written off certain family members for causing myself and other family members too much pain. I believe in second chances, but not in fifteenth chances if you know what I mean. Just because you are blood-related to someone doesn't mean that you are chained to them for life. In fact, very few of my blood relatives (possibly only my dad) would come before my closest friends if I really thought about it.

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                • Brandwin
                  Hall Of Fame
                  • Jul 2002
                  • 30621

                  #413
                  Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

                  I rarely talk or see my father any more. We never had a great relationship (and I don't really have a relationship with his side of the family) but I am pretty much done trying.

                  He and my mother were only married a short time, so I didn't grow up with him in the house.
                  He did take care of me financially and made sure I had what I needed and more, but there is more to being a father than money.
                  I would see him and my mother argue and have physical altercations all the time. Screaming, cussing, pushing, hitting etc... That wasn't just his fault. It was both of them, but not something a child should ever see. This lyric sums it up -
                  "Sometimes at night I would watch y'all fight
                  A child wonderin'
                  Why your life just ain't alright?
                  What's the violence about? Why's it in my house?
                  And even the memories are turned up too loud"

                  When my mother passed, we did get a bit closer and saw each other/hung out more.
                  My son got sick back in March of 2012 and he came down to the hospital the day of his surgery (it was in Austin which was 90 miles from Waco) yet he only stayed for about an hour or so. Didn't even stay long enough for my son to get out of surgery.
                  He called a ton while in the hospital and even when we got home, but he would always say "I'll come by and see you all" - My son couldn't really get out of the house for a while after we got home. My wife and I were off for 7 weeks once we got home and he never came by once. Only time I saw him was on my sons birthday, which was in April. I didn't see him again until my daughters birthday which was December. Now I know it goes both ways, but unless I went by his house, we never saw each other. You would think one would want to see his only child and grandchildren.

                  So that's were we are at right now. I've seen my father 2 times in about a year and we live 20 minutes away. My wife says I should call more often or go by more often, but I am tried of being the one to keep trying. I don't hate the man or anything, but I just don't see the point of trying if the other person isn't going to make the some type of effort.

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                  • JazzMan
                    SOLDIER, First Class...
                    • Feb 2012
                    • 13547

                    #414
                    Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

                    I met my girlfriend through Facebook. My friends don't know, only me and her know, and we are too embarrassed to tell anyone.
                    Twitter: @TyroneisMaximus
                    PSN: JazzMan_OS

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                    • Chrisksaint
                      $$$
                      • Apr 2010
                      • 19127

                      #415
                      Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

                      10 char nvm
                      Last edited by Chrisksaint; 04-17-2013, 09:49 PM.
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                      • Brandwin
                        Hall Of Fame
                        • Jul 2002
                        • 30621

                        #416
                        Originally posted by tyklug2013
                        I met my girlfriend through Facebook. My friends don't know, only me and her know, and we are too embarrassed to tell anyone.
                        If this was years ago I could see maybe being a bit embarrassed, but not now. Tons of people meet online.

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                        • mgoblue
                          Go Wings!
                          • Jul 2002
                          • 25477

                          #417
                          Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

                          Originally posted by tyklug2013
                          I met my girlfriend through Facebook. My friends don't know, only me and her know, and we are too embarrassed to tell anyone.
                          My fiancee and I met through eHarmony. At first I was kinda hesitant to mention that at first (she was the same way), but we realized that tons of people do online dating and there's not the stigma there used to be.
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                          • Champion8877
                            MVP
                            • Apr 2011
                            • 1518

                            #418
                            Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

                            On the subject of POS family members, all of my aunt and uncles are more or less worthless people. Most are nice and funny and I get along with them, but they are pretty much worthless. I can honestly say that my mom is the successful person out of her and her 4 siblings, and my dad is the only successful person out of him and his 2 siblings.

                            On my mom's side of the family, one of my Uncles was hard into drugs, he was pretty much nothing but a burn out. I didn't know him much and only spoke to him 3-4 times in my whole life, despite him living in town. He just never vistited really and my parents never took me to see him, I assume because he was always on drugs. Anyway he ended up overdosing on something or another and died about 5 years ago.

                            My moms other brother just cannot hold a job. He lives off of welfare and foodstamps, as well as his wife working under the table at a neighbors privately owned company. He is physically completely able to work, not a thing wrong with him other than he is lazy. He just cheats the system to get by, and I can't stand people like that. He is one of the funnier guys I know, and I enjoy being around him, but at the same time it disgusts me that he gets by in life doing nothing while others are working their tails off and he collects unemployment and welfare checks.

                            My moms third brother is the most worthless of the bunch. He is an alcoholic, he gets black out drunk every night. He is always bouncing around from job to job. Lately he has somehow held a job as a maintenance man at a hospital for the last 6 or 7 months. But the worst part about him is how much he screws over my grandmother. He moved in with her about a year ago when he was without a job. He then got this job at a hospital, and he works plenty enough and makes enough money that he could afford a small apartment and be on his own. Instead he continues to live with his mother(he is almost 50 and lives with his mom) and he does not pay for anything. He has not payed a dime of rent or utilities. He has only bought groceries once or twice, and does nothing but eat my grandma's food, use her utilities, and spend all his money on alcohol and lottery tickets. And my grandma won't kick him out because she can't bring herself to do that to her child. He is the definition of worthless.

                            My mom's sister is just a psycho, I don't really know what else to say. I try to stay away from her because she is just crazy as crazy gets.

                            On my dad's side of the family, his brother is constantly in and out of jail. He has gotten more DUI's than I can count. He is a worthless drunk who never has a job. Nobody in my family has spoken to him in a few years, the last I knew he was in jail again, but who knows at this point.

                            My dad's sister has been married, and divorced 9 times. She just meets guys and marries them within a few months of dating. I believe she is engaged again, but I'm not certain. But yeah, she is nothing special either.

                            So yeah that is my family. Like I said my mom and dad are the only somewhat successful of the bunch. The rest suck.

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                            • jct32
                              MVP
                              • Jan 2006
                              • 3437

                              #419
                              Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

                              I watch Dance Moms with my wife and kinda enjoy it.
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                              • TDenverFan
                                MVP
                                • Jan 2011
                                • 3457

                                #420
                                Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

                                I found the quick change of secrets (Deep family issues to dance moms) really funny.
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