Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

[jbd345]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Maybe it's just me, but if I were hanging out with a girl that much (working, texting, going to games), I don't see how it can be so hard to ask, "So what does this make us? Just friends or do you want more?"

You have some sort of relationship with her. It seems like a lot of you guys go out of your way to put yourself in the friend zone. If you're spending a good amount of time with someone, I don't think it's unreasonable to suspect they like you on a more intimate level. Not always, but some of your guys stories seem so obvious and you trip over your selves. Girls do lead guys on and don't realize it or don't want to admit it, but... if you don't put yourself out there, you have only yourself to blame. Girls wait for guys to make the move or ask the question, fair or not.

Now I'm really not one to talk. I've had one girlfriend my whole life, who is now my fiance' after 6+ years (we started dating when I was 16 and she was 18). I kind of stumbled into it... we were at a friends house (he was my best friend, his sister was her best friend), they fell asleep or whatever, we got to talking, started talking on AIM, phone, hanging out by ourselves thereafter. That's not to say I wasn't scared ****less to finally kiss her the first time and it took a longggg time to finally do that. But she was my first and I like to think if I was ever single again, I'd be able to read the signs and wouldn't be so scared or nervous to pursue something more with a girl if we were hanging out a lot. And I'm by no means great in social settings. But geez, some of you guys need to get out of your own way!

As for the thread topic, I don't really have any deep dark secrets. Seriously, this has been here almost a month, and I want to post in it... but I don't have any good stories or secrets. My biggest one was that I go on forums like this and used to (still have an urge now and then) write about my sports video game franchise mode like it was real life. But it's not a secret to you guys because we're all here together.

Its very hard to ask. In my opinion I don't want to jeopardize the friendship we have. I've been thinking about this for awhile now. Should I or shouldn't I. I haven't been "friend zone" because I haven't really tried anything on her yet. We became friends first before I even realized I had feelings for her.

[FlyingFinn]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I have never asked a girl on a date. Most of the time, I have tried to "hook up' with them while we were out (party, bar, sporting event etc..). If the next day, they had interest and I had interest, (i.e. we both had interest) (no matter whether we hooked up or not), then we would try a date etc..

[Segagendude]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I actually like listening to ABBA....

[~LiverpoolRed~]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

-Never had sex with a girl, never dated one either. Not that I'm an idealist, but I pride myself on it now and hope that the first girl I'm with is the last.

I've only been with one woman (my wife). First time was when I was 24. We were friends first, dated for 3 years before we got married. I carry the ticket stub from our first date in my wallet. April 3, 2001 - "Someone Like You"

I don't have any real secrets like some of you guys have revealed. I'll just list a couple of things that I'm not ashamed of revealing:

- I failed Grade 12
- I failed my first driving test. Didn't get my license until I was 20 years old.
- Caught for speeding once, 5 years ago or so.

[z Revis]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I've only been with one woman (my wife). First time was when I was 24. We were friends first, dated for 3 years before we got married. I carry the ticket stub from our first date in my wallet. April 3, 2001 - "Someone Like You"

I don't have any real secrets like some of you guys have revealed. I'll just list a couple of things that I'm not ashamed of revealing:

- I failed Grade 12
- I failed my first driving test. Didn't get my license until I was 20 years old.
- Caught for speeding once, 5 years ago or so.

Caught for speeding is a deep dark secret? If it is then you don't even want to know about my driving record.

I still have no idea how my license hasn't been suspended for too many points yet given how stupid I drove in my teens.

[C the Lyte]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

No shame in that. Seems like you're apologizing for having a conscience. Your morals are your morals. Don't sweat it, dude.

As true as this statement is, the social scope of it is not that. I was also a "late bloomer". And the judgements that comes with it is crazy.

[ScoobySnax]

No shame in that. Seems like you're apologizing for having a conscience. Your morals are your morals. Don't sweat it, dude.

Agreed. At least he doesn't have to worry about an STD. Nothing wrong with being clean man!

[Champion8877]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

As true as this statement is, the social scope of it is not that. I was also a "late bloomer". And the judgements that comes with it is crazy.

Same here, I never had my first kiss or a girlfriend until I was 17 and almost the end of Junior year in high school. Some of you guys have been even later than me, but I still think I was pretty dang late. It wasn't that I couldn't get girls so much, I just didn't really try to go after them too much and wasn't interested in having a girlfriend up until I was 17, so I just kinda did my own thing and hung out with my guy friends more instead. My friends did give me a hard time about it though since most of them were already having sex and all that before I even had a first kiss.

[XtremeDunkz]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I have been trying to think of something to share here. I don't have anything super deep like most here, so I'll just rattle off some things.

I slept with one of my close friends ex's for about a year while they were dating, and he still doesn't know.

I went through a phase when i was like 12 or 13 when I would steal things with no remorse or fear. Money, videogames mostly. Never got caught, and no one knows to this day. Only lasted a couple months or so.

I enjoy meaningful relationships. I have had 3 relationships that lasted 2 years or longer, but the idea of marriage and kids never even comes close to entering my mind, yet anyway.

[mgoblue]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Same here, I never had my first kiss or a girlfriend until I was 17 and almost the end of Junior year in high school. Some of you guys have been even later than me, but I still think I was pretty dang late. It wasn't that I couldn't get girls so much, I just didn't really try to go after them too much and wasn't interested in having a girlfriend up until I was 17, so I just kinda did my own thing and hung out with my guy friends more instead. My friends did give me a hard time about it though since most of them were already having sex and all that before I even had a first kiss.

I was a late bloomer as well, and nothing wrong with that. Part of my issue was that I went to an all guys high school. Also, I turned 18 the August after I graduated HS, so I was behind everyone else physically a bit (I kept growing until I was 19, so was short for a lot of HS).

Just have to give it time and learn. I agree though that he should just wait for the right person, it takes time but you'll find her.

I've only had 3 really meaningful relationships, quantity isn't everything.

[jack1535]

- I failed my first driving test. Didn't get my license until I was 20 years old.

You probably did better than me, the first time I took it I got 65 points off. Two weeks later though I re took it and only lost 10. The main reason I lost so many was that the lady was a total bitch IMO

I also have never kissed it gone out on a date with a girl. I have a lot of confidence I can talk to anyone I'm not socially awkward at all, but I was homeschooled and am currently a senior at an all boys private school so I never really have been in a situation where I can meet girls. I did ask a girl to prom, but I got turned down.

[12]

I don't think I will ever recover from my dad's recent sudden, unexpected death. I am forever stuck with a broken heart.

I know I will see him again. I am so thankful that he didn't have to suffer.

Still, life without him feels scary. Other than my wife, he is my best friend.

[Jr.]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

I don't think I will ever recover from my dad's recent sudden, unexpected death. I am forever stuck with a broken heart.

I know I will see him again. I am so thankful that he didn't have to suffer.

Still, life without him feels scary. Other than my wife, he is my best friend.

I'm sorry to hear about your father. I don't know what I would do without my dad and it scares me greatly to think about life without him. My thoughts are with you and your family.

[AC]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Sorry if this bump isn't allowed or anything.

Lately, I've considered the idea of taking my life. If it wasn't for one of my friends... *shudder*

[baumy300]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Lately, I've considered the idea of taking my life. If it wasn't for one of my friends... *shudder*

I don't know your situation, what's bothering you, or if you still plan on doing this, but I can absolutely guarantee that whatever it is isn't worth it.

We have all had some extremely low points in our lifetime, and sometimes things just never seem like they will get better, but then they do.

Keep your head up man. Things will get better and when they do you'll be surprised at how much character you built toughing out the **** times.

Trust me on this one.