Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

[NDAlum]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Sounds like another guy involved...

[Lieutenant Dan]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Sounds like another guy involved...

Yeah, I was thinking the same thing...

[mgoblue]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Yeah, I was thinking the same thing...

Me 3...sounds like she had hidden motives, at least that's my guess. Sometimes girls try to hide stuff like that to be "nice" (or so they say)....

[Husker_OS]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Sounds like another guy involved...

Nah. I thought it at first that she was into someone else and didn't know what to do but I got confirmation that it wasn't. She may be talking to someone else now but it wasn't the case a couple of weeks ago.

[slickdtc]

Well it sounds like it'll be easier to move on now, at least.

[Husker_OS]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

She showed her true colors yesterday. As some of you know, I was laid off at work. They shutdown the entire department of 365 people. I was obviously a little in shock by it all as they preached job security to us all winter and that we're lucky to have secure jobs in this economy.

Anyway I asked her if she could talk for a few minutes that a bombshell had been dropped on me. She told me she had plans that she couldn't talk. So I told her I lost my job. She said she was sorry but she had plans that really couldn't be broken. I told her I'd appreciate even 5 minutes of allowing me to vent my frustration and worries about the job situation. She didn't respond. I sent her a message today and she claimed she had fallen asleep and forgot to call me but even still "we're not together and not friends and I need to go elsewhere for support" because she isn't providing any to me.

So **** her. I don't give a damn if we're broken up or not I just had a life altering event take place and you can't take 5 minutes to talk? **** off. Karma will get her *** eventually and by that time her name will nothing but a memory. The ring I bought her will be the down payment towards the next ring that will be double the size but the same quality of diamond. Maybe that was her true purpose for me.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

What a.... SMFH man.

[jct32]

That is jacked up man. Keep pushing through the tough times man. Someone better will come along and you will live a happy life.

[Husker_OS]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

It really does make me glad I didn't marry her. She wouldn't be a good wife. She won't ever be unless something happens to her and she changes drastically. But she's already lost her dad and her mother is a non-factor in her life so I really don't see her ever changing. She is now what she'll be in 10 years in terms of a potential wife.

Sad thing is she moves next June for residency. 95% chance she has to move out of the state. She's doing surgery so she'll be spending 14-16 hours at the hospital 5 or 6 days a week. She'll come home to an empty apartment and while she says she can live a happy life centered around her career at some point she'll wake up and realize her home life is awful.

Karma's a ***** though.

[TheShizNo1]

Idk, maybe I'm in the wrong, but I don't totally fault her for that. You two aren't an item and I haven't read every post, but are in agreement to move on. As harsh as it is, she doesn't have to listen to you vent and isn't wrong if she chooses not to.

At this point it doesn't seem like a good idea to use her for anything like that. Having negative thoughts towards her won't help in the long run. A feeling is still a feeling.

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[Husker_OS]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Idk, maybe I'm in the wrong, but I don't totally fault her for that. You two aren't an item and I haven't read every post, but are in agreement to move on. As harsh as it is, she doesn't have to listen to you vent and isn't wrong if she chooses not to.

At this point it doesn't seem like a good idea to use her for anything like that. Having negative thoughts towards her won't help in the long run. A feeling is still a feeling.

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I would agree if things hadn't gotten to the point they did. We were together 2 years and engaged which is essentially getting married without a preacher. I don't expect her to drop everything and meet up to talk but really, can't spare 10 minutes for a person you accepted a ring from just 4 months ago when you can tell they're in a spot where they need someone? She wasn't my first choice to reach out to. The timing is terrible because the person I would turn to is on a job site with 0 cell reception.

The past 48 hours has shown that she just lacks whatever it is that tells a person you need to put your **** aside and be a good person. Growing up in the home she did seeing a bitter divorce and then watching her dad pass away from cancer at 21 has really altered who she is. I think it's turned her into a person who can turn off feelings and emotion at the drop of a hat. Being a surgeon is a perfect fit for her when you think about it.

[FlyingFinn]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

So **** her. I don't give a damn if we're broken up or not I just had a life altering event take place and you can't take 5 minutes to talk? **** off. Karma will get her *** eventually and by that time her name will nothing but a memory. The ring I bought her will be the down payment towards the next ring that will be double the size but the same quality of diamond. Maybe that was her true purpose for me.

If my fiancee called off the wedding and broke up with me, she would be the last person I would be seeking condolences after losing my job. In fact, I would have deleted all of her contact information etc...

[BlueNGold]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Yeah, I think I have to agree that I don't fully blame her for not wanting to talk with you about it.

If you ask me, it seems like she's just trying to move on, and as ****ty and hurtful as that is for you that she's doing that, you have to do the same to her, as much as that hurts.

I understand why you would want to talk with her about this. Obviously this is the girl you loved and felt completely comfortable with, so of course you're going to want to fall back on her when it comes to this kind of situation. But by the sounds of it, she's not trying to be that person any more. Honestly, this might be the best thing she could have done for you.

[Husker_OS]

Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

Yeah, I think I have to agree that I don't fully blame her for not wanting to talk with you about it.

If you ask me, it seems like she's just trying to move on, and as ****ty and hurtful as that is for you that she's doing that, you have to do the same to her, as much as that hurts.

I understand why you would want to talk with her about this. Obviously this is the girl you loved and felt completely comfortable with, so of course you're going to want to fall back on her when it comes to this kind of situation. But by the sounds of it, she's not trying to be that person any more. Honestly, this might be the best thing she could have done for you.

I get that but it's a very selfish way of going about it especially considering she was raised in a southern home. I wouldn't leave someone out to dry like that if they put themselves out there and clearly needed a little help. Regardless of past events.

[NDAlum]

She is not being selfish. She wants nothing to do with you (my observation from the thread).

She has moved on and doesn't want to look back. She doesn't owe you 5 minutes.

That's a very harsh reality.

I played your role once and you are heading down a path I took. I am embarrassed by how I handled things. You need to cut her off and move on.


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