I'll be getting the game on Sunday too!
I don't think you really memorize the note charts. You just get more in-tuned to where your fingers are and better coordinated as you play. Just by playing lots of songs will make you better at a song, you don't have to keep playing one song over and over to get good at it. You just need more experience as a whole on the game.
I've been playing these type games with the guitar for a while, but I still remember the first time I played GH1. I started on easy (only 3 different buttons) and it required a lot of concentration, but after about 3 or 4 songs I moved up to medium (only 4 buttons). I stayed on medium through GH1, GH2, and GH 80's. Once I started with GH3 and RB I decided I wanted to play on Hard (all 5 buttons) and either fail the song or pass it, no more medium. I had always flirted with Hard but never played it consistently so I never got used to sliding to cover 5 buttons with 4 fingers. Moving from medium to hard is definitely the biggest jump and it takes time to get accustomed to it unless you are naturally talented at this game. Now I only play Hard and Expert. On RB1 I pretty much always pass Hard songs at around 90-95% or so and I would say 2/3 of the songs on Expert I can pass. But a lot of the songs on Expert I am barely making it through them, making it more fun for me to play on Hard. There's no shame in starting at easy and then staying at medium for a long time. It's no fun failing a song over and over so don't rush yourself to a higher level just because others are playing at that level. If I'm playing online with someone, I'd rather them play at a level they are comfortable at than failling all the time and having to be saved.
I do think the bass is pretty easy on 90% of the songs. You'll be able to play higher levels on bass than you would on guitar once you get used to the game. I think playing bass on hard and expert is a really good way to learn to hit the 5th note because the note charts are easier and you can get accustomed to sliding on the fret buttons. I only play bass on expert and most of the time I'm around 95% or higher whereas on expert guitar I'm around 80-90%.
I've been playing these games since GH1 and I've pretty much leveled out at the Hard level on guitar and I'm fine with that. I try Expert from time to time, but you just gotta find a level that is challenging and fun enough. I like the Hard level because you are playing most of the notes at that point, but you still catch a break at some of the hard parts.
As for drums, they are something I really couldn't get into. I played on easy at first and I found it pretty simple after 3 or 4 songs as well. Medium on drums is all I can handle. I tried to make my way through RB1 on hard drums and it was just too chaotic for me.
I never do the singing so I don't know how its levels are. I would think singing would be fun on any level because they don't leave out words on easier levels like they leave out notes on easier levels of the instruments, that'd be weird LOL.
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